Faithfully married newly diagnosed

[Asr624 1]

Hi everyone,

I have been with my husband for 4 years and married for 1. I had a rash and tested negative for igg but positive for igm. Is it possible my husband had it all these years and didn’t know? I am just devastated and don’t know what to think. Has this happened to anyone else out there? We were not virgins but were celibate before getting married. Any feedback would help. I’m just so depressed and my husband is totally broken because he gave me this unknowingly. He’s gone to get tested but I’m sure it’ll come back positive because I’ve be faithful. My dr said I tested negative for the igg antibody because I haven’t had it long enough to build them in my body.

Edited September 21, 2018 by Asr624
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[LiveLife100 310]

Yes it's entirely possible that he didn't know and just now gave it to you. I've been with my husband almost 19 years and he was recently tested and is still negative. It's still possible of course that I could give it to him at any point. Sounds like you have a strong marriage and there is no reason this needs to be an issue other than a minor annoyance. I have 2 healthy children and have had no related medical issues due to HSV.

[WilsoInAus 2,431]

Note @Asr624 that an IgM result does not confirm a herpes diagnosis.

Was the rash swabbed as well?

[Quest 669]

Did the doctor even look at your rash? Why did she/he come to the conclusion that it was herpes? And that IgM can be something entirely different!

[ill47 28]

Two things:

1.) igm tests are bullshit and I'm surprised your doctor even gave you one. It's swab or igg or nothing. 
2.) It's absolutely possible that your husband got this like ten years ago and only just now gave it to you. Transmission rates per year are 10% (if you don't have sex while he is having an outbreak). That's 10% per year for four years. Some couples transmit like a decade later. 

[Saythatagain 0]

I have been with my girlfriend for going on 3 years. Same issue I popped up with a rash, tested positive, she in turn tested positive. We are in this 50 50 so no clue who had it first. If only they really taught how easy it is to not know and spread this maybe we will start to see things change.