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Lukeherpwalker

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Lukeherpwalker

Just wondering how much difference it makes to disclose. For example i disclose i can pass hsv sexually but im on meds give percentages etc... But i still transmit to my partner... Do you really think she willbe ok with it because i disclosed?  Or will she still be pissed and depressed. Maybe even think i tricked her into it... Basically telling someone wont make much difference once they get it. Depression is depression period

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Bhbr2018

I took my diagnosis in the worst way possible but I think 60% of that was attributed to the person not giving me a choice and then disappearing after. If he had at least used a condom, or told me I may not have spiraled to rock bottom. I just would have never slept with him. Getting herpes and then going through it alone. Double whammy.

In my opinion when you give someone the choice you are no longer responsible if they do contract it. All you can do is be there for her if she ever does. We have enough to go through with the trauma of a diagnosis and the stigma, we don’t also need to put the weight of transmission on our shoulders with an accepting partner. If the person accepts then let go let god. 

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Lukeherpwalker

In my opinion u would be just as sad if he gave u a choice and u caught it. The only thing that could help id if you marry the person. .. Its BS 

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KeepThriving

Uhhh, you really think not telling is better? When you give all of the information you can, she can then take that information and make an informed decision.  If she chooses to have sex with you, then it's on her that she took the risk. If you care about this person, you will be patient, talk about it, and answer any questions she may have.  Maybe even give her links to websites, articles, etc. 

Just because you may have been in a situation where the person who gave it to you knew, but didn't disclose, doesn't mean it's ok if you don't.

You are putting your selfish needs over your potential sex partner. . .and this is why so many people are angry (and rightfully so).

Edited by KeepThriving

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