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speechless_1

Are you open about your herpes?

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speechless_1

Hello,

Im in the UK and have recently been diagnosed with herpes 2.  I am still coming to terms with it but i am keen to consider the stigma surrounding herpes.  

If you don't mind.... would you tell me if you have told many people you have it?  What was their reaction? 

Thanks guys

x

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sameer82
1 hour ago, speechless_1 said:

Hello,

Im in the UK and have recently been diagnosed with herpes 2.  I am still coming to terms with it but i am keen to consider the stigma surrounding herpes.  

If you don't mind.... would you tell me if you have told many people you have it?  What was their reaction? 

Thanks guys

x

I would suggest you don t have to tell many people about it you have HSV ..May be you can tell people with whom you are in relationship now or any future partners ..telling anyone else will make unnecessary more worrying only ... 

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WilsoInAus

Hey @speechless_1

I hadn’t appreciated that you were from the UK. I’m not sure the clinics there type their swabs.

Did you have vaginal and oral sex in the week before your primary outbreak?

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speechless_1
2 hours ago, WilsoInAus said:

Hey @speechless_1

I hadn’t appreciated that you were from the UK. I’m not sure the clinics there type their swabs.

Did you have vaginal and oral sex in the week before your primary outbreak?

Hi, Yes they do type them. I was positive for type 2, negative type 1.  I had only vaginal sex in the week before.  I also just had a private blood test IgG this week and this came back negative.  I just wanted to try and confirm (i know this may not be accurate) that it was a recent infection.

The guy has gone to his Dr and he was given a blood test (i didn't think they would offer this here).  

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speechless_1
7 hours ago, sameer82 said:

I would suggest you don t have to tell many people about it you have HSV ..May be you can tell people with whom you are in relationship now or any future partners ..telling anyone else will make unnecessary more worrying only ... 

Hi, I guess if I am not affected by many ob I have no need to tell people apart from partners.  

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Lulupazoola

I wouldnt want to give anyone info that they might decide to use against me at some point.  U must tell those that u must tell, but otherwise, i would only unburden myself anonymously, like on a forum.  No judgment or harm here.

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Quest

I won't tell people I know because they are too immature with that type of information!

I prefer strangers!

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Anon222

I have only told one person, my roommate. He’s a “free spirit” type though and was very understanding and supportive. I only plan on telling someone I might be in a relationship with in the future, I don’t think anyone else needs to know. 

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bluebell87

i am also from the uk! i got diagnosed with type 2 in sept... i suffered a brutal first ob with fever etc, i told my close friends and my mum, leveryone was great - no judgement at all (i burst out crying the the middle of work lol dramatic) the thought of having to tell a future partner is terrifying though! 

 

chin up :) 

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Celinaxox

Hey so I have told a few people when I was first diagnosed and panicky. My mother knows, and 3 close friends and honestly to my surprise they were very supportive and just wanted to make sure I was okay, they still invite me out like usual nothing has changed and atleast one of them gets oral coldsores it's the same damn thing. I dont tell coworkers I draw the line there and I don't tell men who are interested in me it's not their business unless I choose to become physical with them and therefore risk transmition. I have been dating through a herpes dating site and it's been working out well for me I'm not totally sure I want to be "out" to everyone because the world is still the world and their are immature people out there. 

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Michgirl73

I have told my mother my aunt who also has herpes and my cousin and 2 close friends.. all very supportive, I think they all feel very bad. One my friends I disclosed to have ohsv1 and of course thinks Ghsv1 is way more worse because ohsv1 is so more socially acceptable, nonetheless she is very supportive. I have tried to date but haven’t meet anyone where I felt like I needed to disclose to them. I’m still struggling with this virus myself and trying to accept myself and forgive myself for putting myself into such a situation that allowed me to get this virus. I just want to feel normal again is all.. it seems very hard because my emotional pain is fighting it which causes physical symptoms.

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davidis

Hey @speechless_1, I've had hsv2 for about 5 years now - I've disclosed it to several sexual partners and haven't had any trouble with it so far - I find as long as I don't build it up or make it into a big conversation, people generally haven't cared much.

I've also told a lot of people in my life about it, friends, family, coworkers etc., a few times it's led to some really cool conversations. You learn a lot about people when you talk about it out loud.

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dancingdesigner

I wouldn't tell a soul unless I planned on sleeping the person. 

It's no one's business. 

I know a few ladies that would tell everyone they met and well their reputation is ruined.

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luvurself16
On 11/24/2018 at 10:36 AM, Michgirl73 said:

I have told my mother my aunt who also has herpes and my cousin and 2 close friends.. all very supportive, I think they all feel very bad. One my friends I disclosed to have ohsv1 and of course thinks Ghsv1 is way more worse because ohsv1 is so more socially acceptable, nonetheless she is very supportive. I have tried to date but haven’t meet anyone where I felt like I needed to disclose to them. I’m still struggling with this virus myself and trying to accept myself and forgive myself for putting myself into such a situation that allowed me to get this virus. I just want to feel normal again is all.. it seems very hard because my emotional pain is fighting it which causes physical symptoms.

try therapy. It helps me.

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RNY18

I've told an Ex, a relative &  therapists.

Still too freaked out to tell friends, I've wanted to many times so that could understand the

funk I'm in, but still too soon...

 

 

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Jules1967

I have told 4 close friends (3 of which carry the virus) and my first relationship since I started dating after my husband passed. I was first accepted by him then after 6 weeks, rejected. So now I have learned that I need to be cautious when it comes to disclosing to guys 

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emcee

I don't broadcast it, but I've told a bunch of friends and I've also told three women who I've dated this year (I've had it for over a year now). Reactions from the women I was dating were always fine

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Razzler

@speechless_1 

Honestly, it was a struggle to disclose the situation. I had to consider the impact that it would have in my life and the people around me. We all know that there is still a stigma out there regarding this so I initially chose not to share it  because I was scared of what other people would say or feel. I think it would be best to personally come into terms with it first. Sometimes, we tend to overthink in these kinds of situations. Once you have full acceptance, you would know who to talk with or if you wish to disclose it to anyone. 

It took me quite a while before I disclosed it to my best friend. She got upset that I did not tell her sooner (LOL) but she showed full support for me. I do not intend to share it with anyone else anytime soon but when the time comes, I know I will be ready again.

If you feel that you need to talk about it, you can try to locate support groups within your area or shoot us a message here. I know everyone here would be happy to help each other out.

 

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