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I need advice...

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Hello, my girlfriend told me about a week ago that she has herpes (not the oral one, just genitally) and that she really didn't want to give it to me so we ended up finishing our relationship against both of our desires and it hurt so bad :( . It was very hard for me to hear and even worse for her to tell me. Since she got herpes the only break out she has had was the initial one. Since that she has taken Valtrex and everything seems fine. I guess my question is that when the time comes for us to be intimate with each other and she hasn't had an out break since the initial one. If we use protection and she takes her meds; Is there still a chance that i will get it? And if so what is the percentage? I mean i know for a fact i have no STD's and i would prefer to keep it that way just for my own well being. This is a terrible situation that we have both been put in, if someone could just help me decide on what to do it will make both of our lives so much better.

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From what i've been hearing theres a 4% chance that you can get it.. There is alot of information on these pages about just that question.. Good Luck in the search .. and You are good Man for staying with her and seeking infomation .. Most Men and Women dont stay once told :)

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most don't stay

because they have a choice.

if you're choice is to stay, if i were you i would go to my doctor to ask questions...

my guy & i have been together 3 years. my herpes started about 18 years ago.

my guy has not had herpes (yet) from me. we use condoms if i have PRODROME. we abstain if i have an outbreak. i'm not sure if oral sex (to do for him) is okay when i have an outbreak (not sure if the saliva sheds cells) but so far he's okay.

i'm not subservient to him: it's a real chemistry thing. we're hot for each other. so it's a mutual pleasure if i play with him during my outbreak.

i just read today about the potential of saliva having cells in a genital outbreak... the article stated a low percent but it's food for thought.

my hope is of course that my guy will always be herpes free but there is an inherent risk of my forgetting to use a condom on a day i have prodrome symptoms.

for me, i count any twinge down there, any vague discomfort - as prodrome. then i use protection for about 8 to 10 hours afterward at least.

condoms don't bother him but i'm not sure if i could deal with always using condoms.

using them all the time seems to be the only way to be truly careful, though....

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My doctor told me that even using condoms doesn't stop it. It is anywhere in the underwear/boxer area. It is transfered through skin to skin contact and it isn't always just on the parts a condom protects. If she is on supression therapy like valtrex it helps to reduce sheding (spreading). Herpes itself really isn't so bad. It is painful at times but the stigma that goes with it is more than the actual disease. You need to think hard about it and you are a strong person for seeking information. Many men run away when told about something like this.

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Try a Lysine supplement for cold sores

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    • Ashia
      Hey there. Best thing to do is to go in and specifically ask for a herpes IgG blood test and a swab if you have any active sores / bumps present. That's the only way to know for certain. Your symptoms do not sound like the typical symptoms one would experience, but, each person experiences this virus differently. Best to get checked before assuming the worst. Best of luck to you! 
    • asian_gg
      Good question. I want to know the answer too. I apply Abreva to the infected area preventively and take multivitamin to boots up immunity. I am not sure how effective my method is but it is better than doing nothing I guess. 
    • honkschonks
      My assumption and ignorance of herpes was oozing puss filled blistering sores, pain and sickness. You get it by sleeping with whores and sketchy people. Boy was I wrong. I know this is long but hopefully some of you can relate. A week ago I woke up to small painless blisters on my penis out of nowhere. Never happened before. No pre-itching, no pre-tingling, no redness, no sick feelings, no pain, no discharge. I hadn’t slept with anyone in over a month, so wtf. The next morning they were gone, with cuts/sores left behind. They didn’t itch or hurt, only as much as a cut would. I left them alone. I went to a doctor and showed him a photo of the blisters (because they were already gone), he said looks like herpes. How could it be? No woman I’ve ever slept with in the past two years has mentioned it before, during or after me. I didn’t have one night stands. I had regular friends with benefits who could tell me. The doctor did a swab. I asked for a blood test and he said there’s no point. He was certain, so I went to another doctor. He looked at the photos and said it doesn’t look like herpes. I was confused. I asked for a blood test. He was hesitant, but I got an IGG. Now in the past couple years I have had some cuts between my buttcheeks. I always chalked it up to yeast or not wiping enough or too much. It always came out of nowhere, no sickness, no brutal pain, no ooozing puss filled blisters. I never went to a doctor about it. It was uncomfortable, but eventually went away after a week or two. I had assumed genital herpes meant penis, and I wasn’t having anal sex. On this very forum when I was doing research waiting for results, someone said I was being ridiculous thinking I have herpes with non-symptoms like these. Well, today I went in for my swab results. I’m still waiting for the IGG test, but the herpes culture came back positive for HSV2 isolated. The doctor is certain the IGG will come back positive. I’m not really sure how to deal with all this. Right now I feel like a leper, like damaged goods, but also if I’ve had this for years and had no idea until now, I also feel like it’s no big deal. Not a single person in the past two years has got it from me to my knowledge or were incredibly lucky to get a version that shows no symptoms. My concern is explaining that to people going forward who have my prior assumptions, and will not want me. One doctor told me I should for legal reasons go back a year and tell everyone I’ve been with. Another doctor said that’s not realistic. I didn’t have a major episode where I can pinpoint infection, so how far back should I go? I don’t have contact info for many of these people now. I’m not sure what to do. I have so much more to say. I look forward to talking to you all, and am happy this forum exists. Thanks for listening.  
    • MrKyGuy
      Thanks for the reply - I’ll try not to think about it and I’ll update in a couple weeks either way. 
    • Lumberjuanfifty
      Hello , I'm new to this page. Never though I'd sse so much support from people regarding this so called ( hsv) To be honest I dont even know what's wrong with me . I've tested negative in everything. So a little background, I had sex with a person months back. Then later I found out she was married, her husband calls me uo and says HEY MANUEL GO GET TESTED   I know you and my girl were going out behind me back. But in  reality i had no clue she was married only had sex once. But then after he called me i started seeing weird things going on down their. No burning or anything like that. But I do once in a while get a TINGLING SENSATION. AND LATELY IVE BEEN GETTING VERY TINY RED DOTS oN MY PENIS. when I'm fully erect it turns really red. But no sores or anything like that. The weirdest thing is  semen  feels very very thick. I've never ever experienced anything like that In My life. I'm scared to death to be honest. I cant sleeep nothing at all. It just feels very dry and red  whe erect. What could this possibly be???!!! I would post a picture but in very embarrassed. I'm 30 years old. Had one partner my sons mom for 15 years.  But iva had 2 partners aside from here since we broke up. In the last year. Plese anyone can help me out. I'm in full depress mode.

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