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Biggest regret of my life

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Newone2

Dating someone with cold sores is the single biggest regret of my life. Never again will I be talked into something I know is a huge mistake. This selfish bitch told me I was being  ridiculous and a  germaphobe for making a big deal out of “cold sores” or what it more accurately is “fucking herpes”. My family and friends said the same thing to me when I asked them for advice. They all treated me like some shallow asshole for not wanting to expose myself to an incurable disease and made me feel guilty for it. Even my doctor said there is basically 0 chance of me contracting herpes outside a outbreak to which this girl had not had one in 5 years. I stupidly went against what my gut was telling me due to everyone’s instance that I was overreacting and here I sit with Genital hsv1 because of it. I seriously hope everyone that told me I was being ridiculous gets  Lou Garricks disease.  I HATE the girl that did this to me and feel like I have to be with her now. No one I know has this. I wake up ever day and want to put a gun in my mouth at the thought of my sex life being non existent for the remainder of my life. Sure I can have sex with the piece of shit that did this to me but I find it hard to want to do anything but push her in front of a bus anymore. She ruined my life! My only hope to get my life back is in crispr or by some miracle vaccine. I just hope it happens soon enough so I can live my life normally again. I should have been a asshole and protected myself instead of thinking about her feelings. 

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MikeIke
On 1/26/2019 at 9:44 AM, Newone2 said:

Dating someone with cold sores is the single biggest regret of my life. Never again will I be talked into something I know is a huge mistake. This selfish bitch told me I was being  ridiculous and a  germaphobe for making a big deal out of “cold sores” or what it more accurately is “fucking herpes”. My family and friends said the same thing to me when I asked them for advice. They all treated me like some shallow asshole for not wanting to expose myself to an incurable disease and made me feel guilty for it. Even my doctor said there is basically 0 chance of me contracting herpes outside a outbreak to which this girl had not had one in 5 years. I stupidly went against what my gut was telling me due to everyone’s instance that I was overreacting and here I sit with Genital hsv1 because of it. I seriously hope everyone that told me I was being ridiculous gets  Lou Garricks disease.  I HATE the girl that did this to me and feel like I have to be with her now. No one I know has this. I wake up ever day and want to put a gun in my mouth at the thought of my sex life being non existent for the remainder of my life. Sure I can have sex with the piece of shit that did this to me but I find it hard to want to do anything but push her in front of a bus anymore. She ruined my life! My only hope to get my life back is in crispr or by some miracle vaccine. I just hope it happens soon enough so I can live my life normally again. I should have been a asshole and protected myself instead of thinking about her feelings. 

Sorry man, this totally sucks.  Do you mind sharing what your first outbreak, daily symptoms since then, and testing was like?  Just curious. 

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Newone2
1 hour ago, MikeIke said:

Sorry man, this totally sucks.  Do you mind sharing what your first outbreak, daily symptoms since then, and testing was like?  Just curious. 

Yeah it really does. I seriously don’t want to live anymore most days. I’ll probably wind up killing myself at some point if there’s not a cure in the next few years. As for what it’s been like so far I was infected in late September 2018 and the initial symptoms started three days after oral. I had five small cuts on my shaft that developed into pimple like cuts with no burning or itching over the course of a week. However, on the fourth day I had a swollen limphnode in my groin and had extremely painful urination. The pissing broken glass lasted a week. I finally went to urgent care on the 9th day when I saw what looked like a small cluster of vestals near the pimples. It was swabbed and tested positive for hsv1. I’ve never wanted to murder someone before in my life until that day. In my opinion passing this to someone that knows their status and did not want hsv of any kind is the single most selfish thing a person can do. She should have found someone with her condition instead of passing it on because “it’s not a big deal” fuck that. Since my initial ob I’ve had nerve pain in the back of my right leg but no ob thank god. Not having anymore out breaks after the first or very few seems to be the norm with ghsv1 from what I’ve read so hopefully that will be the case for me. Even if I don’t get the outbreaks I’m still contagious for life though so sex with uninfected people is not a opinion now thanks to this selfish bitch. I just hope there is a cure soon.

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MikeIke
21 minutes ago, Newone2 said:

Yeah it really does. I seriously don’t want to live anymore most days. I’ll probably wind up killing myself at some point if there’s not a cure in the next few years. As for what it’s been like so far I was infected in late September 2018 and the initial symptoms started three days after oral. I had five small cuts on my shaft that developed into pimple like cuts with no burning or itching over the course of a week. However, on the fourth day I had a swollen limphnode in my groin and had extremely painful urination. The pissing broken glass lasted a week. I finally went to urgent care on the 9th day when I saw what looked like a small cluster of vestals near the pimples. It was swabbed and tested positive for hsv1. I’ve never wanted to murder someone before in my life until that day. In my opinion passing this to someone that knows their status and did not want hsv of any kind is the single most selfish thing a person can do. She should have found someone with her condition instead of passing it on because “it’s not a big deal” fuck that. Since my initial ob I’ve had nerve pain in the back of my right leg but no ob thank god. Not having anymore out breaks after the first or very few seems to be the norm with ghsv1 from what I’ve read so hopefully that will be the case for me. Even if I don’t get the outbreaks I’m still contagious for life though so sex with uninfected people is not a opinion now thanks to this selfish bitch. I just hope there is a cure soon.

Any chance you have pictures of what your first outbreak looked like or a similar online picture? 

The same thing happened to me. Got oral from someone with hsv1. She said she didn't think to tell me. Now I'm pretty sure I have it in both places but only have visual diagnosis for mouth cold sores. My penis hurts everyday and I get nerve pain randomly in my butt, rectal region and testicles.

Ive been on daily Valtrex for 1 week, 

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JHenry

NewOne & MikeIke,  

I am sorry for the pain this situation has caused both of you.  After nearly 35 years of GHSV2, while I can’t say it doesn’t  ever trouble me every now and then, for the most part—it’s a non-issue a majority of the time.

I’m guessing you are both a bit younger then me, I’m 66–if so, take comfort in knowing you have time on your side.  In my heart of hearts, I  believe there will be something significant announced in the next 2-5 years, I’ve been following this bug for over three decades.   When diagnosed 30+ years ago, my primary care physician promised a cure in 10 years and asymptomatic shedding was an unknown.   While he was off the mark—much progress has been made, more is known than before and the knowledge base expands annually at a rate never seen before.  

While I know this does not “change” your current situation, but on a positive note, know that with GHSV1, the asymptomatic shedding rate is  3-5% vs. 15-30% with GHSV2.  Quoting here “Daily suppressive medication can reduce shedding by 50-90%”.  While I am not a mathematician, but with Valtrex—my guess is if using  4% as an average, it reduces shedding to  0.4-2%.  While not perfect, its a 1.2% overall average on shedding.   Others here are welcome to correct my numbers—I’ve always been mathematically challenged.  

To that point, I read recently and while I can’t remember exactly, it said something like “with shedding episodes, just 30% manifest the viral load necessary to transmit.”  Do Not quote me —but its something might want to look into it.  

I understand how you feel and wish I could wave a wand, but know that eventually, someone with knock this out of the park and  both mentally and emotionally you will be made whole again.  Please try and see the glass as half full, remove the rear view mirrors and try and keep your eyes fixed through the windshield—it’s the future that matters most.    I firmly believe it’s only a matter of time and everyone will be fine. 

Henry

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Roja
3 hours ago, Newone2 said:

Yeah it really does. I seriously don’t want to live anymore most days. I’ll probably wind up killing myself at some point if there’s not a cure in the next few years. As for what it’s been like so far I was infected in late September 2018 and the initial symptoms started three days after oral. I had five small cuts on my shaft that developed into pimple like cuts with no burning or itching over the course of a week. However, on the fourth day I had a swollen limphnode in my groin and had extremely painful urination. The pissing broken glass lasted a week. I finally went to urgent care on the 9th day when I saw what looked like a small cluster of vestals near the pimples. It was swabbed and tested positive for hsv1. I’ve never wanted to murder someone before in my life until that day. In my opinion passing this to someone that knows their status and did not want hsv of any kind is the single most selfish thing a person can do. She should have found someone with her condition instead of passing it on because “it’s not a big deal” fuck that. Since my initial ob I’ve had nerve pain in the back of my right leg but no ob thank god. Not having anymore out breaks after the first or very few seems to be the norm with ghsv1 from what I’ve read so hopefully that will be the case for me. Even if I don’t get the outbreaks I’m still contagious for life though so sex with uninfected people is not a opinion now thanks to this selfish bitch. I just hope there is a cure soon.

1) She told you and was honest with you. Right?, It was your choice to say no. Why is she a selfish bitch then? Did she force you into having sex? 

2) Believe me, I am 100% sure that you already had a blowjob from someone who had hsv1. You maybe even had sex with someone who had ghsv1 or 2 without knowing it. Because most people a) don't even know or b) just don't disclose

3) Approximately 70-80% (!!) percent of the population are hsv1 positive. So even if you had not had sex with her, you probably would have had sex with someone who is has the virus. 

Come on, you'll probably not even suffer from regular outbreaks. And with 80% of the population being positive chances are quite high that most of your future sex partners already do have hsv1. Probably most of the girls will be happy because there is no more risk of transmitting it to you so they can give you great BJ without worrying about it. ;-) 

You'll still have great sex, believe me. 

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Newone2
3 hours ago, JHenry said:

NewOne & MikeIke,  

I am sorry for the pain this situation has caused both of you.  After nearly 35 years of GHSV2, while I can’t say it doesn’t  ever trouble me every now and then, for the most part—it’s a non-issue a majority of the time.

I’m guessing you are both a bit younger then me, I’m 66–if so, take comfort in knowing you have time on your side.  In my heart of hearts, I  believe there will be something significant announced in the next 2-5 years, I’ve been following this bug for over three decades.   When diagnosed 30+ years ago, my primary care physician promised a cure in 10 years and asymptomatic shedding was an unknown.   While he was off the mark—much progress has been made, more is known than before and the knowledge base expands annually at a rate never seen before.  

While I know this does not “change” your current situation, but on a positive note, know that with GHSV1, the asymptomatic shedding rate is  3-5% vs. 15-30% with GHSV2.  Quoting here “Daily suppressive medication can reduce shedding by 50-90%”.  While I am not a mathematician, but with Valtrex—my guess is if using  4% as an average, it reduces shedding to  0.4-2%.  While not perfect, its a 1.2% overall average on shedding.   Others here are welcome to correct my numbers—I’ve always been mathematically challenged.  

To that point, I read recently and while I can’t remember exactly, it said something like “with shedding episodes, just 30% manifest the viral load necessary to transmit.”  Do Not quote me —but its something might want to look into it.  

I understand how you feel and wish I could wave a wand, but know that eventually, someone with knock this out of the park and  both mentally and emotionally you will be made whole again.  Please try and see the glass as half full, remove the rear view mirrors and try and keep your eyes fixed through the windshield—it’s the future that matters most.    I firmly believe it’s only a matter of time and everyone will be fine. 

Henry

@JHenry I sure hope you are right. If all I have to do is wait five or ten years to be rid of this I’ll consider myself the luckiest man alive. In the few months that I have been infected with this evil virus I have read up on everything I possibly could to better educate myself so I can attempt to not feel as bad about having it. The only comfort I find is in the reasurch that is being done at the moment and the breakthroughs the scientific community has made in recent years.  Thank you for the encouraging words. It means more then you know.

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Newone2
2 hours ago, Roja said:

1) She told you and was honest with you. Right?, It was your choice to say no. Why is she a selfish bitch then? Did she force you into having sex? 

2) Believe me, I am 100% sure that you already had a blowjob from someone who had hsv1. You maybe even had sex with someone who had ghsv1 or 2 without knowing it. Because most people a) don't even know or b) just don't disclose

3) Approximately 70-80% (!!) percent of the population are hsv1 positive. So even if you had not had sex with her, you probably would have had sex with someone who is has the virus. 

Come on, you'll probably not even suffer from regular outbreaks. And with 80% of the population being positive chances are quite high that most of your future sex partners already do have hsv1. Probably most of the girls will be happy because there is no more risk of transmitting it to you so they can give you great BJ without worrying about it. ;-) 

You'll still have great sex, believe me. 

She is a selfish bitch because she did lie to me. She wouldn’t have told me she had it unless I had brought it up and that was three months into being  intimate (after physical contact and feelings were involved). I had asked in the beginning of the relationship if she had been tested and she tells me yes and everything was negative. She didn’t feel hsv1 counted since she had it as a child and therefore wasn’t a std. I made a big deal of it when it came to light and was in a nutshell guilted, missled, and made to feel like a asshole for not wanting herpes. I thought to myself if I stay with this girl it is only a matter of time until I catch it. Everyone else “including my fucking moron of a doctor” insisted that was not so and that I was being ridiculous. So I started to doubt my understanding of herpes. I stupidly thought that maybe it wasn’t as contagious as I believed it to be and you could be with someone without catching it. WRONG! What she should have said to me was if you want to be with me you will catch herpes eventually because that is exactly what will happen if you are with someone that has it and you do not. I knew that was the reality and I got guilted into thinking otherwise. That is why she is selfish. She lied about the reality of the situation. She knew it was a big deal to me and she down played her condition and manipulated my feelings for her own selfish needs. I would never do that to anyone. I won’t ever do that to anyone. 

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Newone2
6 hours ago, MikeIke said:

Any chance you have pictures of what your first outbreak looked like or a similar online picture? 

The same thing happened to me. Got oral from someone with hsv1. She said she didn't think to tell me. Now I'm pretty sure I have it in both places but only have visual diagnosis for mouth cold sores. My penis hurts everyday and I get nerve pain randomly in my butt, rectal region and testicles.

Ive been on daily Valtrex for 1 week, 

I’m sorry that happened to you as well man. It is not a great feeling. Unfortunately I don’t have any pictures for you but I can almost  guarantee if you caught it on your penis you would know. It hurts like hell man. Did you have any leasions down there? If you did the only way to tell would be with a swab test. 

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MikeIke
1 minute ago, Newone2 said:

I’m sorry that happened to you as well man. It is not a great feeling. Unfortunately I don’t have any pictures for you but I can almost  guarantee if you caught it on your penis you would know. It hurts like hell man. Did you have any leasions down there? If you did the only way to tell would be with a swab test. 

no lesions, but daily pain in the glans, random itching on penis head and testicles, random nerve pain in butt/thigh. red/wrinkled as well with skin peeling.  no classic lesions

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RainyDay2
On 1/26/2019 at 9:44 AM, Newone2 said:

Dating someone with cold sores is the single biggest regret of my life. Never again will I be talked into something I know is a huge mistake. This selfish bitch told me I was being  ridiculous and a  germaphobe for making a big deal out of “cold sores” or what it more accurately is “fucking herpes”. My family and friends said the same thing to me when I asked them for advice. They all treated me like some shallow asshole for not wanting to expose myself to an incurable disease and made me feel guilty for it. Even my doctor said there is basically 0 chance of me contracting herpes outside a outbreak to which this girl had not had one in 5 years. I stupidly went against what my gut was telling me due to everyone’s instance that I was overreacting and here I sit with Genital hsv1 because of it. I seriously hope everyone that told me I was being ridiculous gets  Lou Garricks disease.  I HATE the girl that did this to me and feel like I have to be with her now. No one I know has this. I wake up ever day and want to put a gun in my mouth at the thought of my sex life being non existent for the remainder of my life. Sure I can have sex with the piece of shit that did this to me but I find it hard to want to do anything but push her in front of a bus anymore. She ruined my life! My only hope to get my life back is in crispr or by some miracle vaccine. I just hope it happens soon enough so I can live my life normally again. I should have been a asshole and protected myself instead of thinking about her feelings. 

I feel your pain, man.  Biggest regret of my life will be trying to have sex with someone that has HSV2.  Even had a condom on, and it broke soon as I got inside her.  Not even 5 seconds of sex, and now I'm infected with some crap they can't even tell me what it is.  I feel your anger every day.

Edited by RainyDay2

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Newone2
22 minutes ago, MikeIke said:

no lesions, but daily pain in the glans, random itching on penis head and testicles, random nerve pain in butt/thigh. red/wrinkled as well with skin peeling.  no classic lesions

I’m not going to tell you it isn’t possible but ghsv1 almost always causes some kind of primary outbreak that would have red bumps or  lesions. To not have that would be very odd. Type 2 doesn’t always cause a primary but type 1 you would know. You had a oral outbreak though? 

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MikeIke
1 minute ago, Newone2 said:

I’m not going to tell you it isn’t possible but ghsv1 almost always causes some kind of primary outbreak that would have red bumps or  lesions. To not have that would be very odd. Type 2 doesn’t always cause a primary but type 1 you would know. You had a oral outbreak though? 

i recall red spots on my penis that would appear after a shower then seemingly go away.  ive never seen a vesicle like lesion down there, though.  

i did get oral breakouts.  visual diagnosis has been mixed between perioral dermatitis and hsv1

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Newone2
17 minutes ago, RainyDay2 said:

I feel your pain, man.  Biggest regret of my life will be trying to have sex with someone that has HSV2.  Even had a condom on, and it broke soon as I got inside her.  Not even 5 seconds of sex, and now I'm infected with some crap they can't even tell me what it is.  I feel your anger every day.

Sorry to hear that man. I don’t know if you got “talked” into it in the same way I did but you are not alone. Hopefully there will be a cure soon so we can get our lives back and never make a mistake like that again in our lives.

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MikeIke
1 minute ago, Newone2 said:

Sorry to hear that man. I don’t know if you got “talked” into it in the same way I did but you are not alone. Hopefully there will be a cure soon so we can get our lives back and never make a mistake like that again in our lives.

nah she  said she "didnt think to tell me" and also wont date me anymore because i reacted "disrespectfully"

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Newone2
4 minutes ago, MikeIke said:

i recall red spots on my penis that would appear after a shower then seemingly go away.  ive never seen a vesicle like lesion down there, though.  

i did get oral breakouts.  visual diagnosis has been mixed between perioral dermatitis and hsv1

Honestly it’s a very tricky virus and unfortunately most doctors seem to be very uneducated on the subject. The best advice I can give you would be to either try and get a wound or  lesion swabbed by your doctor or urgent care if you develop another one. Make sure you get it type  specific as well if that happens. Option two would be to wait three months from when you think you were exposed and get a blood igg test done. That will tell you if you are positive or not but won’t tell you the site of infection. Unless you breakout in a area and get swabbed there’s no way to know where you have it. What is going on with your penis doesn’t sound like a outbreak to me but I don’t know. 

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RainyDay2

@Newone2Yea pretty much did get talked into it.  I was planning on ghosting her after she told me one day, but my boy was like you should still be cool with her since she was real with you and told you, and I felt guilty. We had already been intimate, kissing and shit in bed, but no sex, so I was happy she told me but mad at the same time.  She kept texting me and I did some research and the bullshit they tell you online says you have a 4% chance of catching it if she's not having an outbreak, and if you wear a condom even less of chance. I was like wow, that's not bad.  But I strongly feel now that's a fucking lie. So after much hesitance, and a few weeks of trying to dodge her texts, she texts me on a drunken night and in the end I went over and planned on just hanging with her.  One thing led to the next, and I decided to have sex but be very safe.  No hip touching, just penis in the vagina.  She felt the condom she gives me break inside as soon as we start.  Worst night of my life.  Ran to the bathroom and washed off the yeasty white vagina secretions on my dick and prayed to God I wasn't infected.

Two days later my dick is tingling at the tip, and then all types of shit starts happening to my body.

Every blood test I've taken has been negative.  The big pimple that popped up in my pubic hair days after the incident never got swabbed because my doctor said it looked like an ingrown hair so I wanted to believe her.  I wish she would have just swabbed the shit like I told her to.

I fight this depression and anger every single morning.  I'm still living my life the best I can, and just want a damn diagnosis so I can at least know for sure I have it.  Every time my penis burns, some random nerve burns in my body, or my anus itches, I get reminded of that fucking night.  Nothing ever appears on my penis though, so I have nothing to swab. 

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Newone2
6 minutes ago, RainyDay2 said:

@Newone2Yea pretty much did get talked into it.  I was planning on ghosting her after she told me one day, but my boy was like you should still be cool with her since she was real with you and told you, and I felt guilty. We had already been intimate, kissing and shit in bed, but no sex, so I was happy she told me but mad at the same time.  She kept texting me and I did some research and the bullshit they tell you online says you have a 4% chance of catching it if she's not having an outbreak, and if you wear a condom even less of chance. I was like wow, that's not bad.  But I strongly feel now that's a fucking lie. So after much hesitance, and a few weeks of trying to dodge her texts, she texts me on a drunken night and in the end I went over and planned on just hanging with her.  One thing led to the next, and I decided to have sex but be very safe.  No hip touching, just penis in the vagina.  She felt the condom she gives me break inside as soon as we start.  Worst night of my life.  Ran to the bathroom and washed off the yeasty white vagina secretions on my dick and prayed to God I wasn't infected.

Two days later my dick is tingling at the tip, and then all types of shit starts happening to my body.

Every blood test I've taken has been negative.  The big pimple that popped up in my pubic hair days after the incident never got swabbed because my doctor said it looked like an ingrown hair so I wanted to believe her.  I wish she would have just swabbed the shit like I told her to.

I fight this depression and anger every single morning.  I'm still living my life the best I can, and just want a damn diagnosis so I can at least know for sure I have it.  Every time my penis burns, some random nerve burns in my body, or my anus itches, I get reminded of that fucking night.  Nothing ever appears on my penis though, so I have nothing to swab. 

Jesus Christ man I’m sorry that happened to you. I feel like we got infected for not wanting to hurt someone’s feelings over something they couldn’t change. Because we weren’t assholes about it we now have it ourselves. Would you believe my good friend said the same thing to me that yours did? Funny thing is I’d bet our friends have never been in our situations and wouldn’t act that way if they had been.

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RainyDay2
Just now, Newone2 said:

Jesus Christ man I’m sorry that happened to you. I feel like we got infected for not wanting to hurt someone’s feelings over something they couldn’t change. Because we weren’t assholes about it we now have it ourselves. Would you believe my good friend said the same thing to me that yours did? Funny thing is I’d bet our friends have never been in our situations and wouldn’t act that way if they had been.

That's exactly what happened man.  That's why I'm so angry, because if I had just been an asshole like my gut was telling me to be, and had just ghosted her, my life would've been completely different these past 6 months.  The fact that I've been suffering for the last half a year over 5 seconds of sex is infuriating.  I go to bed every night wishing I could just do that one night over and just have ignored her text.  But all I can do is go on living, and try to at least get a diagnosis.  If there's one thing I've learned from this is that sometimes in life you just gotta be an asshole and not give a fuck about anyone else's feelings.

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Newone2
13 minutes ago, RainyDay2 said:

That's exactly what happened man.  That's why I'm so angry, because if I had just been an asshole like my gut was telling me to be, and had just ghosted her, my life would've been completely different these past 6 months.  The fact that I've been suffering for the last half a year over 5 seconds of sex is infuriating.  I go to bed every night wishing I could just do that one night over and just have ignored her text.  But all I can do is go on living, and try to at least get a diagnosis.  If there's one thing I've learned from this is that sometimes in life you just gotta be an asshole and not give a fuck about anyone else's feelings.

Trust me man, I get where you are coming from. I don’t think I have ever actually hated someone until this happened to me. Our stories are so fucking similar it’s scary. Just try and hang in there brother. It may be 5 or 10 years out but a cure is coming. I 100% agree with your last statement too.  If there is anything you and I can take from this fucked up experance it is that sometimes it is better to be called an asshole and protect ourselves then worry about someone else that only has themselves in mind at the end of the day. If the scumbags that did this to us had actually cared they wouldn’t have risked passing it on. 

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Hopefloats30

I'm sorry y'all are going through this. I just got recently diagnosed but I don't know how long I have had it. I am scared and sad and feel unwanted. I don't know how to carry on with my life. I don't feel normal anymore. I don't even feel pretty anymore. 

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Newone2
8 minutes ago, Hopefloats30 said:

I'm sorry y'all are going through this. I just got recently diagnosed but I don't know how long I have had it. I am scared and sad and feel unwanted. I don't know how to carry on with my life. I don't feel normal anymore. I don't even feel pretty anymore. 

I’m sorry you are going through this as well. No one should ever have to experience this. Did you get it from someone with a cold sore too? It’s hard for the first few months. I’m still new to this bs as well. 

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Hopefloats30

i don't know when I got this. I know that I have been cheated on a lot. Thankfully I have never had sores but I have burning and itching that I've always thought was a yeast infection. I just wish I would have known sooner. I hate this. 

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Roja
6 hours ago, RainyDay2 said:

@Newone2Yea pretty much did get talked into it.  I was planning on ghosting her after she told me one day, but my boy was like you should still be cool with her since she was real with you and told you, and I felt guilty. We had already been intimate, kissing and shit in bed, but no sex, so I was happy she told me but mad at the same time.  She kept texting me and I did some research and the bullshit they tell you online says you have a 4% chance of catching it if she's not having an outbreak, and if you wear a condom even less of chance. I was like wow, that's not bad.  But I strongly feel now that's a fucking lie. So after much hesitance, and a few weeks of trying to dodge her texts, she texts me on a drunken night and in the end I went over and planned on just hanging with her.  One thing led to the next, and I decided to have sex but be very safe.  No hip touching, just penis in the vagina.  She felt the condom she gives me break inside as soon as we start.  Worst night of my life.  Ran to the bathroom and washed off the yeasty white vagina secretions on my dick and prayed to God I wasn't infected.

Two days later my dick is tingling at the tip, and then all types of shit starts happening to my body.

Every blood test I've taken has been negative.  The big pimple that popped up in my pubic hair days after the incident never got swabbed because my doctor said it looked like an ingrown hair so I wanted to believe her.  I wish she would have just swabbed the shit like I told her to.

I fight this depression and anger every single morning.  I'm still living my life the best I can, and just want a damn diagnosis so I can at least know for sure I have it.  Every time my penis burns, some random nerve burns in my body, or my anus itches, I get reminded of that fucking night.  Nothing ever appears on my penis though, so I have nothing to swab. 

Maybe you just don't have herpes? Why don't you get another blood test? 

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Newone2
10 hours ago, MikeIke said:

nah she  said she "didnt think to tell me" and also wont date me anymore because i reacted "disrespectfully"

Wow... What a special kind of piece of shit she is. Im sorry that happened to you. I know this doesn't help your situation but you are better off without a scumbag like that in your life. 

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