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Alot of H hate

Did not disclose herpes to my gf. Instead I broke up with her before I gave it to her or had to disclose

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Alot of H hate

I started talking to a girl who I never thought would get serious. We had sex without me disclosing. And the next thing I know I'm months into a relationship and shes wanting to get serious. I was to afraid to disclose to her. I wanted to stop being to risky with her health by not telling her and still having sex...so I ended things with her. Gave her a bs reason why and now shes heart broken. I am to but on top of it even more depressed bc I love her and I know this is how things will always be for me bc of herpes. ....has anyone else experienced this? I've also had this for 11 yrs now and havent told not one person! Idk just super depressed and heart broken and wanted to vent to someone. Thanks

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GotMeAtLast
8 minutes ago, Alot of H hate said:

I started talking to a girl who I never thought would get serious. We had sex without me disclosing. And the next thing I know I'm months into a relationship and shes wanting to get serious. I was to afraid to disclose to her. I wanted to stop being to risky with her health by not telling her and still having sex...so I ended things with her. Gave her a bs reason why and now shes heart broken. I am to but on top of it even more depressed bc I love her and I know this is how things will always be for me bc of herpes. ....has anyone else experienced this? I've also had this for 11 yrs now and havent told not one person! Idk just super depressed and heart broken and wanted to vent to someone. Thanks

And what will you say when in 6 months when she starts to have issues? or a year from now? You should have told her instead of risking her health. You made a poor decision by walking away.

You are the reason the innocent gets hurt.

Edited by GotMeAtLast

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lali
52 minutes ago, Alot of H hate said:

I started talking to a girl who I never thought would get serious. We had sex without me disclosing. And the next thing I know I'm months into a relationship and shes wanting to get serious. I was to afraid to disclose to her. I wanted to stop being to risky with her health by not telling her and still having sex...so I ended things with her. Gave her a bs reason why and now shes heart broken. I am to but on top of it even more depressed bc I love her and I know this is how things will always be for me bc of herpes. ....has anyone else experienced this? I've also had this for 11 yrs now and havent told not one person! Idk just super depressed and heart broken and wanted to vent to someone. Thanks

You should still let her know....I know that's not what you want to hear. But you really should. She'll be pissed but she might understand where you're coming from also.

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Roja
3 hours ago, Alot of H hate said:

I started talking to a girl who I never thought would get serious. We had sex without me disclosing. And the next thing I know I'm months into a relationship and shes wanting to get serious. I was to afraid to disclose to her. I wanted to stop being to risky with her health by not telling her and still having sex...so I ended things with her. Gave her a bs reason why and now shes heart broken. I am to but on top of it even more depressed bc I love her and I know this is how things will always be for me bc of herpes. ....has anyone else experienced this? I've also had this for 11 yrs now and havent told not one person! Idk just super depressed and heart broken and wanted to vent to someone. Thanks

We all make mistakes. Now is the time to not make another one. Be honest. Meet her. Tell her. The whole story. 

You know what? Maybe she will laugh and tell her she also has it. Maybe she will be pissed and ever talk to you again. Maybe she will be happy you still love her and she doesn't even care. There are thousands of possibilities. But just one for you: tell her. 

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JHenry
2 hours ago, blurneworder said:

Do the right thing

Agreed.   As I used to tell people that worked for me “You’ll never get in trouble if you just tell the truth.”    Do it before it’s too late.  

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Happybee

Be honest with her if you love her and maybe she shpuld go get hsv2 bloodwork make sure she doesnt have it 

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Southwestrancher
7 hours ago, Alot of H hate said:

I started talking to a girl who I never thought would get serious. We had sex without me disclosing. And the next thing I know I'm months into a relationship and shes wanting to get serious. I was to afraid to disclose to her. I wanted to stop being to risky with her health by not telling her and still having sex...so I ended things with her. Gave her a bs reason why and now shes heart broken. I am to but on top of it even more depressed bc I love her and I know this is how things will always be for me bc of herpes. ....has anyone else experienced this? I've also had this for 11 yrs now and havent told not one person! Idk just super depressed and heart broken and wanted to vent to someone. Thanks

Why don't you just tell her the truth? Tell her it's incurable (so far) and you diddn't want to put it on her. Which you would most likely eventually. 

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lali
17 hours ago, Southwestrancher said:

Why don't you just tell her the truth? Tell her it's incurable (so far) and you diddn't want to put it on her. Which you would most likely eventually. 

What makes you say she will eventually get it? Theres 5% chance every year for a women. Plenty of couples havent passed it on.

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Southwestrancher

It's pretty likely if you have sex frequently. 5% means 5 times out of 100 times having sex. With antivirals it's a little better. Like 1%-2% but.....I know what you're saying. It's definitely russian roulette though. 

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WilsoInAus
1 hour ago, Southwestrancher said:

It's pretty likely if you have sex frequently. 5% means 5 times out of 100 times having sex. With antivirals it's a little better. Like 1%-2% but.....I know what you're saying. It's definitely russian roulette though. 

No it doesn’t mean that, it means there is a 5% chance at the END of a 100 episodes of sex that one is infected.

Hence the per episode chance is assessed as follows:

x ^ 100 = 95%

Hence x equals 0.9995 chance of not being infected per episode thus 1 in 2,000 per episode of being infected.

Edited by WilsoInAus

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Southwestrancher
1 hour ago, WilsoInAus said:

No it doesn’t mean that, it means there is a 5% chance at the END of a 100 episodes of sex that one is infected.

Hence the per episode chance is assessed as follows:

x ^ 100 = 95%

Hence x equals 0.9995 chance of not being infected per episode thus 1 in 2,000 per episode of being infected.

Whatever. I doubt your reasoning. Fact is you're still playing russian roulette 

Edited by Southwestrancher

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WilsoInAus
1 hour ago, Southwestrancher said:

Whatever. I doubt your reasoning. Fact is you're still playing russian roulette 

So what? You do that crossing the street, having a baby, changing jobs... all these have far worse consequences than herpes.

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Southwestrancher
On 2/12/2019 at 11:25 PM, WilsoInAus said:

So what? You do that crossing the street, having a baby, changing jobs... all these have far worse consequences than herpes.

But you don't intentionally do it with other people's bodies. 

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IloveCoco
On 2/12/2019 at 9:40 PM, WilsoInAus said:

No it doesn’t mean that, it means there is a 5% chance at the END of a 100 episodes of sex that one is infected.

Hence the per episode chance is assessed as follows:

x ^ 100 = 95%

Hence x equals 0.9995 chance of not being infected per episode thus 1 in 2,000 per episode of being infected.

How is that even possible? To me it took only one time Male to female GHSV1 with a condom on, no oral sex from either, and no french kissing. My luck...

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WilsoInAus
4 hours ago, Southwestrancher said:

But you don't intentionally do it with other people's bodies. 

People don’t hit pedestrians?

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WilsoInAus
2 hours ago, IloveCoco said:

How is that even possible? To me it took only one time Male to female GHSV1 with a condom on, no oral sex from either, and no french kissing. My luck...

What herpes do you have which types? Where do you get outbreaks?

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IloveCoco
13 minutes ago, WilsoInAus said:

What herpes do you have which types? Where do you get outbreaks?

Like I wrote, genital HSV 1, outbreaks on outer vagina labia. And it also has been more than one outbreak since the first in dec. I am starting to not trust the statistics available online. Feel tingling most of the time. 

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WilsoInAus
7 hours ago, IloveCoco said:

Like I wrote, genital HSV 1, outbreaks on outer vagina labia. And it also has been more than one outbreak since the first in dec. I am starting to not trust the statistics available online. Feel tingling most of the time. 

Was your blood test low positive?

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Southwestrancher
On 2/15/2019 at 2:11 PM, WilsoInAus said:

People don’t hit pedestrians?

Someone should put you out of your stupidity. 

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WilsoInAus
50 minutes ago, Southwestrancher said:

Someone should put you out of your stupidity. 

The only stupidity is likening herpes transmission to Russian roulette.

How is that so?

What role does such a comment play on a herpes SUPPORT site?

 

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