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Manda

Herpes 2 and Oral Sex

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Manda

I have herpes 1 and 2. I have been dating someone for almost 2 years now. I have finally confessed to them I have herpes. I understand it was something I should have done when we meet but I was afraid of rejection. I love him and he loves me. He accepted me. I have been having craving for oral sex for a couple months now. I feel guilty because I love him and upset that he does not want to give me oral. He cums fairly quick so I barely ever orgasm. He tells me all the time to touch myself until I cum which is pretty annoying. Before I mentioned it he would give me oral once in a while. Now he seems to be so afraid to even touch me down there even with his hand. He is positive for herpes 1 before he met me. He is still negative for herpes 2. I used to get several outbreaks years ago but now I get maybe 2 a year. The outbreaks are quite small. I don’t know how to feel. He accepts I have it but I’m not sexually satisfied in this relationship but I love him very much. I have cravings for oral sex. He does not care if he gets it in his penis but continues to say what if he gets it all over his face. Again he is herpes 1 positive. We have unprotected sex all the time and in the end I still give him oral sex. 

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WilsoInAus

@Manda your boyfriend's logic is totally off here. As he already has oral HSV-1, the chances of him being infected in that region are negligible, of no real concern. I don't think I have ever heard of a person to whom this has happened (a HSV-2 infection on top of a HSV-1 infection orally).

Even if it does happen, it will not case any additional issues to the HSV-1 infection in any event.

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Manda

I constantly mention that to him and he begins to send me google pictures of people with herpes all over their face and their tongue. Makes me feel awful and horrible inside. I love him very much but makes me feel like he is just selfish and disgusted to even touch my private area since. Like I said I have not had a break out since we began dating I barely get any. I’m not in suppressive drugs. I do have them on hand for when it does happen. Well I was diagnosed with both because when I got tested for HSV-2 my doc tested me for HSV-1 and I was positive for both. He accepts me for having it but says he does not want it all over his face as if he will be rubbing his cheeks inside my private area.... totally makes no sense. He is totally uneducated and I explained to him it’s contagious if you touch an outbreak and touch another area. 

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Manda

I had this since my early 20s and I am now 34 I was with someone in my past for 10 years and we did it all together. For some crazy reason he never got it in his private area but had an outbreak on his lip. 

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WilsoInAus

@Manda what was your numerical result for HSV-2?

Your partner is being highly immature. I would suspect a number of those photos are not of HSV and would be of HSV-1 if they are. His behaviour is unacceptable for an adult I'm afraid to say.

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Manda

Numerical result? The doctor never told me that part..... was I suppose to be told. If so what does it suppose to mean? 

I agree that’s why we are taking a break because he needs to think about what he wants I can’t continue like that.... 

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