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Hey everyone,

Got diagnosed 5 months ago and only recently have I actually been receiving the backlash. Before I just ignored it and pretend it wasn't happening. I haven't had sex with anyone since or even come close to - so didn't have to tell anyone. The only reality came when I had to go back to the Hospital.

I have found it really hard to deal with it head on, especially as I don't have the support from the person who gave it to me!

I think all men are going to run away from me - funnily enough he (person who gave it to me) is now in a happy, new relationship (he unfortunately gave it to her too but she seems to have accepted this rather gracefully and is still with him!?)

This leaves me as a twisted, lonely bitch!

So anyone feeling remotely the same? Get in touch!


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I feel evil hoping the guy I think gave it to me, gave it to the girl he is currently dating. We didn't even end on bad terms, but I keep thinking, if she knew he had it she would leave him, and he would come back to me. Talk about twisted thinking. I don't think I even like him that much any more, just I know he already has it and I wouldn't have to tell anyone else.

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I'm in a situation where one of two men gave me this. One is going on friday to get tested and I feel evil hoping it was him who gave it to me. when I told him he got angry with me which I totally understood at the time but then proceeded to act like a self righteous egotistical jerk. He stopped short of calling me a whore. I'm 39 years old and he's 40. He was preaching to me like I was one of his teenage kids. He actually said he would be the biggest shmuck if he had this and was walking around with it and then said he would find it so hard to believe because he takes care of his body and is healthy. I told him that was offensive. I work out several times a week and eat very healthy. I'm not a shmuck!!! He made me so angry I was actually hoping he would wake up some morning and his pee pee would fall off!! I know that's evil. The other guy is one of my best friends and is in total denial. We keep fighting cause he won't get his butt in gear and get tested. Oh did I mention he's still sleeping with his girlfriend. I told him he was making me angry cause he was going on with his life like nothing is going on and I"m the one sitting at home crying my eyes out everytime I had to pee.

Talk about twisted minds, I sometimes hope it's the schmuck and he'll realize I would be the easiest person for him to be in a relationship with since I have the virus, I'll know he has it so he doesn't have to tell me and theirs no future risk to either of us to exposure. I don't want to be alone. I just don't want to have to tell someone and be rejected.

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      Well I had no idea that was against the rules here. 
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      It's against the forum rules to provide your email related to products. If I'm wrong, then the Admins will ignore my report. No harm done.
    • cowpoke02
      sex is okay its a weapon and clouds your judgement .  lose your purpose get used and have a kid or hearth problems from a real sinner devil . i know of government agents dating a woman to see whats going on . knocked her up and broke up .  makes her life hard and mental abuse of it all nd your future .  bad people . she was protestor .  had other events stalking threats . her friend moved to russia to escape stalking they go into your home leave things int turn in . mind games ..  stick to plan and not get misled .. all gods saying.  you end up with bg problems and may never get to your purpose the easy way . haha .  people kept me form it all time . many people are invested in themselves giving you bad advice .. their purpose not your purpose ... our body wears out , health problems . open to all sorts problems .  life can fall apart year after year , trapped with devils .. evil world . stick to your guns and morals .. gonna have sex like it and make smart choices .. sex enslave you faster anything. oldest trick in society and crimes go through sex and women as pawns and men playing games .  
    • cowpoke02
      any hot christian single and looking ? haha  . sex love is closes you ever get to god or enlightenment with loved one ..  religion  is fertility worship as well . you were screwed if couldn't have kids in old days for labor ..,  may pole is dads member shooting his seed and kid runs around it holding the ribbon/ seed .. celebrating life and father / mother ..  churches are kinda kinky .  just fertility .  i wouldn't say sex is sin ..  just saying be careful and don't get burned . be smart .  stay out of trouble . don't give your heart away it hurts and shortens life ..   don't lose your purpose and goals .. stay on path .  thats from philosophy as well. religion didn't create all this but it gets all the credit . lol.  i learning from you guys ..  like to make book . bible and ntuar religion and holy spirt and philosophy in it . make new bible . be awesome . creator / god version . 
    • cowpoke02
      it is good in many ways and very bad .  mostly good in it . if you interpret it right or understand it . mot don't till its to late . aha ..  a peace happy good life thing .. be happy cantdoit .  think of good christians . such great people . wish i grew up their neighbors . i lived with phsyco devils of earth in my own family .  no peace and hell on earth  , slave abused  rumored community beaten .  i could of learned court rules and life hacks from world history that are always true in current times ..  people make it to static and tyrant god is all instead of community and simple rules and laws .. equal people . 

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