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Herptronik

Just found out.

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Herptronik

WHAT THE HELL! This is SICK SHIT! I had been with my girlfriend for 2 years and JUST LAST WEEK she told me she had herpes! I went to get tested and sure enough I tested positive. If I had known I would have told that bitch to kick rocks the very first day, I was so proud of never even having a cold sore in my entire life, and what I figured to be a re-occouring yeast infection or some shit turned out to be herpes. I called the cops on her for infecting me against my will and they just laughed! I am so fucking pissed rigth now I could just die! I looked it up online and i guess alot of you people decide to fuck and tell, and imo thats SICK SHIT! How can you be so insensitive!!!! Right on this very fourm a woman was told she was BRAVE for telling her partner AFTER THE FACT! Fuck that, thats a COWARD BITCH! Gee You sure are brave for giving someone an STI against their will! I think this is one of the most fucked up things you can do to someone. I told my now ex girlfriend to get the fuck out of my house, she said I WASNT TAKING HER FEELINGS INTO CONSIDERATION!!!!! WHAT NERVE! I have now consumed 7 fiths of wiskey in 7 days after never having drank in my entire life, I am trying to decide if I should use my hair drier in the shower or if i should jump out my window. Has this happened to anyone else? I would like to speak with someone who can relate to my situation please, I am not very happy right now.

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memyselfI

pissed

I'm sorry to hear about your circumstances! I don't know how it happens, I don't get it; how people can knowly have sex and not thell their partner about herpes ...I believe you were implying she knew she had it right? With all the stigmatisms regarding herpes, its not surpirse trying to lessen the shock confusion and the boat load of other emotions that come with learning you are positive. You could sue you ex; unfortunately that can cost alot of money initially and there is no guarentee you will get anything from it. ...Are you sure your girlfriend knew she had it? Two years is a long time. Why did she decide to tell you now I wonder?

Having herpes is not great, it sucks, but it is not the end of the world. I am sorry about your unfortunate new and it sounded as though you were being sarcastic about the hairdryer in the shower but please don't even consider it. I am usually a pesimest but I have to tell you this is not the end of the world but it is going to take some time for you to accept and learn to live with. We have all been there; the first day, the first week, the first month that we found out we have the virus. You are not alone. We all have a different story about how we found out, being diagnoised, who we got it from, etc but one thing is consistant in that it was not good news to anyone... but you know what, life goes on. We live, we fall in love, we go on vacations, read books, make mistakes, follow our dreams... life does go on and it can be great.

My first reaction to anything that happens in life that is not what i have wished for or preffered is anger, but when that melts away I find the true feelings stem from ego and fear, self pity and lack of faith. Take it one day at a time. Utilize this website. It is a TREMENDOUS help in all H related issues. You are not alone!

You are loved! Wishing and praying for you and your future.

meme

its going to be okay!

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chicago girl

Thankfully you are not my boyfriend

First of all you need to stop drinking. That solves nothing. Second of all, you need to have a talk with your girlfriend. If you have been with her for two years, I would hope that you would be a little more sensitive to her feelings. Did she just find out? She may have honestly thought it was a re-occuring yeast infection. She may not have known either. She may be feeling the similar feelings that you have right now if she just found out too.

I suspect I have had it for years and never knew. My boyfriend has been nothing but supportive since I found out. I don't know how I would have gotten through this without him. When I found out I had it, I accused him of giving it to me~~I had never even had a cold sore either. He tested negative, so now I know I am the one. I have been with 3 men in 20 years, not a slut or whore or bitch or whatever else you think of people with herpes. Consider the fact that you may have been the carrier of the virus, without knowing and you gave it to her. That is a very real possibility!

In a relationship, the hard times show what kind of partner your boyfriend or girlfriend will be long-term. Is your plan to drink every time something goes wrong? Why would you call the cops on her for something she may not have even known about? Humilating her like that is uncalled for.

Maybe she did know. Maybe she didn't tell you. If so, you have every right to be pissed. You have every right to break up with her for not being forthcoming. But how you handle it shows what kind of person you are. It is your choice. You can either choose the high road~~talk it out, find out the facts, ask her honestly and calmly to talk about it with you, and then you can educate yourself. Or you can choose the low road. You'll recognize that path, as it is the one you are on right now.

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alwaysalone

i got this one of two ways man, either a girl i had sex with that i knew for 7 years gave it to me in which case she new and didnt tell me OR the girl i was dating who was about 9 years older then me gave it to me and failed to also tell me. this is the ONLY way i could have gotten it as i was tested before both of those girls. SOOOO as i said. same thing i wasnt told about it and i know one of them knew. stop drinking. dont hurt yourself just cause someone else can hurt you. someone steals your wallet you dont get back at them by throwing your new one in the trash.

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MissRosebud

I agree

No reason to freak out and go crazy. We have all gotten this without knowing, with out any control or choice. And those who did get it by choice then shows a lot. It is not like your girl drugged you and took advantage or raped you. Talk about wanting to die!

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baffled07

We need more information...why did she just now tell you? Did SHE just find out as well?? I am sure she is just as shocked and devastated as you are. This STD is very sneaky and highly contagious...and we have not been EDUCATED enough by the medical field of the transmission of this STD. Herps IS NOT something that you are tested for annualy or if you go in for a "check-up" unless you SPECIFICALLY ask for it..it is not a part of the normal STD screenings!!!! (I just found this out myself, eventhough I go to the gyno every year and have for almost 20 years)!!!! If you are positive, there IS the possibility that you already had it. You need to do more research and read more of the posts on this site. What kind do you have? HSV-1 (oral or genital)...or HSV-2 (oral or genital)??

You need to try to calm down and think about this....and educate yourself. You are not going to DIE from this STD...my gosh, you haven't even had an outbreak...consider yourself "lucky" at this point. Think about why it has been "dormant" in your system...and who knows for how long...maybe your one of the few that won't have any outbreaks!!!! There is a STRONG POSSIBILITY that you already had it, and are the one who transmitted it to her.....sorry to tell you that. If she just now showed signs of her first "outbreak"...than it's possible that you gave it to HER.....the blood tests can tell you what your anti-body levels are ...if they are high..(5.0) than it means you've had in your system for many years...if it is "low"..than it could mean that it is fairly recent. Herpeselect is the best test...

I feel sorry for your girlfriend..and to humiliate her by calling the cops on her...that is soooo sad. I transmitted HSV-1 to my partner via oral sex not EVEN KNOWING that I had HSV-1....just imagine the other person's feelings...to have no freaking clue you even have something...and to give it someone...for life.....................IT ALSO "SUCKS" BEING ON THE OTHER SIDE AS WELL.......especially when YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU HAVE SOMETHING!!!!!!!

It will take a while for this to sink in...

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Argh

I certainly hope you will tel your future partners . . .

It sound like you're going to tell all your future partners from now on, huh? I just hope they don't react the way you did. I would be sad for you. And by the way you are now included in "you people". You are on the other side now and I think you will appreciate someone being understanding to your new condition. I've recently been diagnost . . . I know who gave it to me (gift that doesn't stop giving)!!! And I am furious!!! Interestingly enough -I was polite in telling him, as I didn't want him to jump off a bridge if I told him I hated (I didn't say that) him for being irresponsible at my expense. Most of my thoughts of ending a life include me. . . I couldn't do it myself, of course . . . but if I drop out of the sky while traveling, sometimes I think I would be happy. Mainly because this make me responsible for other people's well being. I wish I could be so careless, as to do what he did to me but I'm just not that kind of person. You aren't going to die . . . It's just annoying. K?

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austintxee

I agree with everyone; you need to calm down. You must not have cared about her a whole lot to tell her to hit the road for having an std. She isn't a different person and neither are you. Most of us on this site have gotten it and never given it to anyone. Most of us didn't get a choice in it either. I, for one, was raped.... I had no choice at all. I don't want to be rude, but I just feel like you would have left at the first sign of trouble anyway. If she got hit by a car would you leave? I know it is tough to accept... We all do.

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catiesmom

The person on this site was commended for making a responsible decision, even if it was a bit late. When someone doesn't tell, it's a bad decision. But even, after 2 years, someone tells, it's a good decision, despite the bad decision they made prior. Yes, we commend good decisions and do our best not to judge people by the bad decisions they may have made. Telling you was a good decision on her part - at least now you know! Imagine if you'd continued to see her, broken up with her for whatever reason, then found out you had it by passing it on to your next girlfriend. THAT would have been the ULTIMATE bad decision on her part. We can't fix what people have already done, but here we try to encourage people to make the RIGHT decision, even if it's late in coming.

All the things i want to scream at you have already been said - you could have been the one to transfer it to her especially if you've got a latent case. You might want to know more about why she didn't tell you or how long she's known. This is not the end of the world, it's just a bump in the road, and from now on your own personal decisions will affect the health of others as her personal decision affected yours. I hope you choose to tell UPFRONT rather than wait - it would be a small victory over herpes. If we all told beforehand (IF we all knew), this virus might stop dead in its tracks. As it is, doctors downplay the severity of having HSV (with no regard to the mental anguish it causes), and often have incorrect information about transmission.

I know you're mad, but when you're done being mad, try getting some answers.

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