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raymour

My Story and Plea for Advice

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raymour

Hi, everyone. I am currently panicking about herpes as I'm sure a lot of you have. I really need some advice. Basically the story is that I'm a female that had unprotected vaginal sex and performed oral sex about 12 days ago. Exactly a week later I had a sore throat and swollen glands in my neck. I thought I noticed something different about my lips and had some itching in the vaginal area. I went to my doctor who was sure that anything in my genital area was from a yeast infection (but took a swab of the rash and did all std tests that can be done that early) and that my lips were just from being dehydrated. I told her about my sore throat but she seemed confident I just had a cold or something that also had me dehydrated so my lips were dry. Just days later, I'm noticing more white spots and bumps on my lips. They don't really look like pictures I can find of herpes on the internet but they definitely weren't there before. I'm trying to decide if I should go back to the doctor? I put cold sore medicine on the bumps because while I'd like to be able to do a culture, I can't have massive sores on my lips so I guess I don't know if the medicine is keeping it at bay or if it's not herpes at all. As much I'd like to be relieved that my doctor thinks I dodged a bullet, it just seems too coincidental for the sore throat and bumps on my lips to be happening a week after unprotected sex. I have no idea about how often you'd get oral symptoms above genital symptoms when both areas could have been exposed. I'm just so scared and obviously a blood test isn't conclusive until 12 weeks.

 

I suppose I'd really like 2 pieces of advice.

1) How does your oral herpes itself? Is it clear blisters or more of white dots?

2) How do you think I should approach the person I had sex with? It was a drunk hookup and while he swore at the time he was clean, I'd really like to ask him again. I wanted to wait until after I went to the doctor but my appointment didn't ease my mind at all. I'm not sure what to say to him beyond "Hey I'm scared you gave me herpes but it's too early for me to get tested so maybe you should" and I don't think that would go over well

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blurneworder

You are not the first to come here with the issue of white bumps showing up on your lips after sexual contact.

Ive never seen any reasonable explanation for it. I have no idea if it’s associated with HSV. Did you test positive?

There is another recent thread about this same issue.

Edited by blurneworder

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raymour
14 minutes ago, blurneworder said:

You are not the first to come here with the issue of white bumps showing up on your lips after sexual contact.

Ive never seen any reasonable explanation for it. I have no idea if it’s associated with HSV. Did you test positive?

There is another recent thread about this same issue.

My doctor did not want do a blood test because I've never had cold sores or anything before and I was less than 2 weeks from what would have been my exposure. She didn't think she saw anything that pointed to herpes. I kind of wish I'd insisted just to see if I might have already had hsv1. She recommended I do the tests at 3 months. The culture from the swab from my vulva rash has not come back yet but the rash cleared up in a day of having a yeast infection treatment so I don't think the culture will show anything. I'm really debating going back to the dr. for the second time this week to have her look at my lips and swab them even though they aren't really sores (yet anyway) as well as do the blood tests

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WilsoInAus

Hey @raymour there’s a very rational explanation for your lips. They may be fordyce spots. These are oiled up sebaceous glans. They expand and contract for a variety of reasons including dehydration and hormonal changes. This condition is entirely independent of any herpes related issue.

An initial infection of herpes is usually unmistakeable with lesions to swab. It does not appear as mutiple white dots.

In terms of the partner, I do not recommend you suggest anything until you have a firmer indication of what is going on for you. There is no utility in it I promise you.

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Roxanne11

Google fordyce bumps and I'm sure you'll see that that's what they are. These are normal - we also have them on our vulva's. They appear more prominent for different reasons - mine shows a lot when I'm really hot and flustered they seem much more pronounced. But otherwise if I stretch the skin of my lips I can see them. 

Don't tell your partner anything yet until you have more conclusive evidence like lesions that can be swabbed. 

I'm new to this whole herpes thing and I have learnt a hell of a lot!

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raymour
1 hour ago, WilsoInAus said:

Hey @raymour there’s a very rational explanation for your lips. They may be fordyce spots. These are oiled up sebaceous glans. They expand and contract for a variety of reasons including dehydration and hormonal changes. This condition is entirely independent of any herpes related issue.

An initial infection of herpes is usually unmistakeable with lesions to swab. It does not appear as mutiple white dots.

In terms of the partner, I do not recommend you suggest anything until you have a firmer indication of what is going on for you. There is no utility in it I promise you.

When I started doing more research, I thought they might be fordyce spots as I've had them in the corner of my mouth before. I've just never seen so many and them so large on my lips before.  I don't remember ever being able to feel them. They look different than I've ever noticed my lips looking and some have increased in size. One side of my top lip is so dense with them it almost looks like it is layered which has me worried I'm going to wake up tomorrow with blisters there. I suppose only time will tell at this point and me stressing isn't helping the situation any. 

 

You are correct about telling my partner. It is a bad idea. I think the only reason I want to is because I won't be able to rest comfortably until I get tested at 12 weeks and not knowing if I've actually been exposed is scary. He also has expressed desire to see each other again and not I'm not sure I'm comfortable to do so with this scare. 

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