Sad and scared

[hurtinganddesperate]

I haven’t been diagnosed yet (getting tested on 8/30) and I’m about 6 days post-contact but I think I’m having my first OB. It’s incredibly itchy and painful. I know this comes from the stigma but I feel disgusting and untouchable and like I’ll never have a normal relationship ever again. I’m so sad. I also struggle very heavily with depression and I’m worried that this is going to send me into a spiral. I know I haven’t been tested yet but it really looks/feels what they say herpes is supposed to look/feel like. Please, I need some advice on dealing with the pain, both physical and emotional

[DownWDisease]

First, you are not alone! I fully understand that feeling. When I was first diagnosed in 2016 I was devastated. I have always battled with depression and anxiety and getting this diagnosis gave me more of a reason to loathe myself. I went through all the stages of grief, and finally, I realized that the only way I could make myself feel better was to learn all I could about the virus. The doctors had been less than helpful in guiding me. They basically told me I had it, and then prescribed Acyclovir to take whenever I had an outbreak. This was fine, for awhile, but 2 years later, I started getting back to back outbreaks, and had to begin taking daily supressive medication. I was also battling breakthrough outbreaks and terrible nerve pain. I was still given no real guidance. It was online that I found out just how NOT alone I was. Armed with information, I made changes in diet and lifestyle, I am now able to manage this thing, and not let it consume my life. If there is any way that you can get to a doctor before the 30th, I would HIGHLY recommend it, as the sooner you start the antivirals(assuming you actually have herpes, remember you may NOT) the sooner you can stop the progression of the OB and get on the mend. I just found this community and I plan to use it to stay updated and connected with others about this virus. I think it's brave that you have come here and reached out for help. I wish you all the best! I hope that you DONT have herpes, and that this will just be a cautionary tale for you. Also, remember, YOU ARE NOT UNLOVEABLE OR UNWORTHY! Relationships DO happen. I have plenty of positive friends that have been in long, loving relationships. Breathe. It will all be ok, no matter what. 

[LightafterDarkness]

It really really sucks but it will get better. I echo the sentiments on the antivirals. If its confirmed as HSV the faster you get access to the medication the better they can work

 

Some thoughts that I am copying over from another thread

• Get educated- read up about this virus alot. Know this thing inside and out including stats etc.
  • Read through stuff on this forum
  • I also recommend reading answers / thoughts provided by Terri Warren (nurse with 30+ years of experience in the field) https://westoverheights.com/forum/herpes/herpes-questions/
• Get to know your body
  • Throw out any habits that are unhealthy: cutdown on sugar and white wheats, eat more vegis/fruit, sleep more, workout
• Get to know and start following whats coming down the pipeline into potential treatments. Take heart from this if possible
  • Read research papers
• Open up to someone you trust - a close friend, a family member, a therapist, someone else with HSV. I think talking about it with someone - anyone - is important
• Give yourself the space to recognize you are going to have good days and bad and realize (1) its ok, (2) tomorrow is a new day
• Remember that you are still a pretty great person regardless
• Patience- some days you will have to grit your teeth / chin up
• Last -> remember that in the US alone something like 30M+ have HSV2- millions are in relationships. For good or bad there is a selection bias for what you read here- for every one person on this board there are hundreds if not thousands who are not.

[Monty321]

Please get tested, and the doctor to swab the areas and check for hsv types.