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Muslim brother from London, UK


nwlondoner

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As salam walaikum everyone, I'm just coping my other post that i made on the introduction page.  I'm hoping to reach out to other people in a similar situation to myself (Muslim with herpes). I'd just like to find someone who I can talk to maybe and find out how they've dealt with it and their experiences so far.

So, I found out last week through a private blood test that I have herpes. It felt like my entire future shattered before me and I actually couldn't even cry on the first day, I was just in so much shock. It was only the next day that I found myself, just crying randomly out of nowhere.

I had thought i was clean and free from any STDs as I had taken a blood test at an NHS sexual health clinic however it turned out that they don't include the herpes blood screen as most people are asymptomatic and they want to reduce the stigma attached with herpes. At first, I thought ignorance would have been bliss in this situation as most people will have herpes but not be told that they have it unless they take a private blood test or show symptoms.

But then, I just thought that I could be passing it onto other people and what made me scared the most was about passing it onto family members, especially young children like young niece and nephew who I've kissed and potentially put at risk. I feel so paranoid when I'm near young babies now and try to keep my distance, I've seen pictures in article about a newborn baby was kissed by someone with herpes and their eye has swollen up.

Islamically, you're not allowed to marry a person without telling them you have herpes. I was just wondering if there were any Muslims would have been able to get married and how they found their spouse.

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Sallam alaikom, Hsv has no boundaries and does not discriminate. Your worries are oral hsv1 I'm suspecting and rest assured youre not alone. It's known 80% of the world population has hsv1. I'm sure many many Muslims carry the virus as well. The masjid I attend I notice many having cold sores all the time. Rest assured you'll be just fine brother

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As salaam walaikum, thank you for replying to me. The blood screen results showed that I have the antibodies for both hsv1 & hs2. I was in a relationship with someone and I think I may have caught it from them. I regret my actions and it has been incredibly painful news to find out that I have herpes. However, I'm just moving forward with my life and I find that it is a blessing in a sense, I've always found myself close to Allah however a lapse in judgement has lead me to having this condition but it has made me turn to Allah even more. There was one ayah in the Qur'an that has always provided me with comfort and I find myself remembering now more than ever. "Verily in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find peace." (13:28). 

I understand the consequences of my action although I'm not necessarily looking to get married right now, I guess I was just trying to find out more about any brother's or sister's stories about how they dealt with their situations and if they were able to get married. I'm prepared for a future where I may not be able to find someone but I find myself more at ease with whatever Allah has willed for me now. My priority right now has been just to focus on getting back into the Deen. There's not a lot of other Muslims I can ask for help but I thought I would reach out wherever I could for advice and help.

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  • 2 years later...

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