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chicago girl

please help me....

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chicago girl

I am in such a bad place right now....is there any one out there who can offer words of support? Please tell me it is not as bad as it seems.....

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HC-Support-Team

Power of Now

Hi chicago girl,

Whenever my thoughts are jumping up and down and I am finding it hard to see the way forward I grab a page of one of my Eckhart Tolle books, they have helped me immensely.

I suggest reading "The Power of Now" or "A New Earth". I would not normally suggest this as a means to coping but I have found it very helpful in my own life and so maybe it will be of some help to you too.

You can read more about this way of thinking here.

Hope this helps a little,

Shenda

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VVK

What's going on chicago girl? I'd like to tell you that it is not as bad as it seems. It would be easier to give better council if you could write more about what you are feeling and what is distressing you. Hang in there and try to find reliable support, whether it is here or from people in your life that you know and trust. It really helps. If you'd like, you could PM me.

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austintxee

Hi there,

I wish I could offer more support but if you are trying to deal with herpes it will get better. There will be ups and downs to it, but you will get through them. Tell us what you are feeling and maybe we can help you a little more. When I found out I thought my world was falling apart, but I realized there were some good things that came of it. I have become a lot healthier, exercise more and eat right. I know that I will not have sex with any random people anymore because I don't want to spread this but without knowing this I could have gotten something much worse (HIV). The person who loves me and says he would give his life for me will certainly stay with me despite this. It has been hard for me and for many other, but maybe understand your pain can help us support you better. You will help others too and that feels good. Tell us more about how you are feeling and we will be here for you. PM if you want to!

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chicago girl

Two days before my diagnosis, my friend died. His funeral was four days after my diagnosis...add stress to stress.... At his funeral, four days on the medication, I lost vision in my left eye. At the reception following the funeral, I lost feeling in the right side of my body. My arm was completely dead, I couldn't make sentences. Should have gone to the ER, but I didn't~~didn't want to create a scene at the funeral.

I have lost vision in my eye~~it was 20/20 before, now I can't read a computer screen, it is red, swollen, dry etc.... Thought maybe I gave myself ocular herpes. Went to the eye doctor today and he says there is nothing wrong, expect I need glasses (had Lasiks a couple of years ago). Made no concern of the fact that the right side of my face is still numb.

I have called my GP twice about this. He seems to be not concerned, said it was probably a reaction to Famvir, he then prescribed Valtrex. But I am freaking out!

Can stress cause the body to react in such a way????

I feel like I am frozen. I can't do anything. Making a phone call is impossibly hard. I have folded laundry on my family room floor for four days now, can't put it away. My house is a mess. My work isn't done. Yet, all I do is sit on my couch.

My boyfriend is coming over soon, so I have to put on my happy face. No one knows my pain, because I have such a good happy face. I am up for a major award at work, little do they know I am falling apart outside the office......

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Hope1606

Hey chicago girl!

I'm so sorry to hear whats happening. I wish i had all the answers to your questions but all i can say is don't stop looking for them. I'm sorry to hear about your friend. The stress can't be doing any good on your body. Stress is never good on any body. Maybe you need to find a way to relieve some of it even if its hard. Let your boyfriend know that you are hurting because you know he wants to provide you all the comfort in the world! You need comfort and understand and from what you've told me, he will give it all to you! I'm sorry i'm so late writing but i just got out of work. Please keep us informed on your situation! We care!

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VVK

chicago girl,

In your position, I would seek a second opinion if possible from another doctor. Make sure that you describe what you are experiencing in detail - the numbness and the loss of vision. These aren't things that doctors are supposed to brush off. If the symptoms are persisting, you should get them looked at by a specialist.. numbness of one side of your body is not something I could find listed as a side reaction to Famvir.

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rollercoaster38

Chicago Girl

I wouldnt pass this off like the Dr. did. I finally found a new Dr. and went yesterday. She was awsome, she sat and tallked to me for over an hour before she did an exam. I had been passing off irritation down there for the virus, she looked at the fluid under a microscope and I have a severe infection. She thinks it has to do with all the biospies I had done. She also found my cervix is 3x's its normal side and I have serveral non-cancer tumors. She did more biospies and I go back next week. She gave me 14 days of samples of Valtrex and a prescription for 12 months to be filled if I need it. I am also on an antibiotic for the infection so she put me on Valtrex while I'm on the antibiotic. She said sometimes antibiotics can make you have an outbreak. She's about 90% sure I am gonna have to have a hysterectomy because of my cervix.

The reason for telling you all this, I was blaming everything on the hsv and my previous Dr. was doing the same. Come to find out there is alot more going on which seems to be serious.

Please hang in there, if you are not better I would go to the er. You can IM me anytime and I can tell you the process I went thru to find another Dr. I'm sure all states have this service.

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shutterbug

Chicago girl!

I 'm just sending you lots of HUGS!! You have certainly been through the ringer lately, and I know (believe me, I know) how frustrating that can be!! You just HAVE to stay positive... find ways & reasons to laugh (it always helps me!) or just completely indulge in something that makes you feel good (shopping spree anyone?!) I promise you it will get better!!

Also, my best friend had something similar happen where she lost feeling in her face and limbs on one side of her body and it ended up being a bout of Bells Palsy (?? I think). It ended up not being a big deal, and she was treated and is fine now... Not trying to diagnose you over the internet but just offering something to ponder...

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chicago girl

And tomorrow is another day.....

I am over my panic attack. Panic attacks are kinda like outbreak, you never know when they are coming and they completely suck!

Thanks for all of the advice. Rollercoaster, you are right. I am getting the feeling that everything is being lumped together with the herpes. Maybe the whole eye thing is related to the medication and/or stress. But I think I need to do a little more investigating to make sure.

Shutterbug, you are right on the money. I went out yesterday and bought a $350 Calvin Klien Coat (got it on sale for $100, but I still like to think of it as a $350 coat!!!) The coat was made for me. Yesterday, in the middle of my meltdown, I put on my new beautiful coat and cried in it. It did help a little. But then I took it off for fear of getting mascara on it.

I think my boyfriend must have thought I was completely insane last night. He has seen me cry before, but never quite like that~~sitting on my floor in a teddy (I tried to work the sexy side and hide my meltdown~~didn't work...), in my beautiful jacket, sobbing hysterically about everything. Why does the man stay with me? I am a crazy loon! I'll never understand him. Any other man would be heading for the hills after seeing that meltdown!!

Thanks again......

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tulipblossom

i too was recently diagnosed and felt like crawling in a hole. writing about it helps as well as this website. it is a skin virus that can be on the face and mouth the fact that it is on our genitals has a stigma attached to it. we can break this stigma by showing our faces being brave and telling potential partners, but really it is noones business unless they will be a sexual partner or want to pursue a relationship with you. read as much as you can about herpes and i like to call it hispes, there are many foods you need to stay away from and perhaps you can check into yoga and meditation. remember 1 in 4 females has this and 1 in 5 males, we are not alone, it is more prevalent than we could ever imagine it is, just that noone is telling. be brave i am thinking of you and be strong keep your chin up you are much more than this could ever be. peace sister! audrey

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