Jump to content

New member, newly diagnosed.


Recommended Posts

Hello, I'm new here and was diagnosed with genital herpes 2 weeks ago. I have a lot of questions but dont know where to start. My boyfriend and I have been in a faithful relationship for 6.5 years now, and I just had my first outbreak and he has never had one before. We are unsure of who had it to begin with, I assume it was me considering I had an outbreak first. I feel awkward and weird in my relationship, and sex life now, even though he was very understanding and accepting with the situation. He said it could have been either of us and there isn't anything we can do to change it.. which is true. I dont really know what I'm looking for here, maybe just some advice and others personal experiences with the same situation as myself. 

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

Hello @Lou_95 and thank you for taking the time and having the bravery to come forward to seek help. I hope you find some assistance and find solace. 

What has occurred here happens to many couples and it is important to note that it highly likely that this has absolutely no questions surrounding fidelity etc.

The first thing to note is that your assumption is the other way around. When a person has their first herpes outbreak, then it is extremely likely that they have been just infected by the other party. Herpes does not wait around taking its own sweet time to cause an outbreak. When first infected, you are in a sense 'defenceless' against the virus so havoc can be wreaked - well the lesions that you experienced.

If your partner is quite sure they have not been infected genitally with herpes in the past, then the most rational explanation is as follows. Your partner may well have an oral HSV-1 infection that causes oral cold sores, even if he has no living memory of cold sores! You hence may have become infected through oral sex about 2-6 days before you noticed the sores.

Your diagnosis may have included the type of herpes involved, was it 1 or 2? 

If my guess above is right, then you both now carry HSV-1 and cannot technically reinfect each other, or at least give your immune 6 months to get up to full speed. He is now already immune and is incredibly unlikely (if there is any chance at all) of becoming infected genitally).

If this is the story, then that's kind if it for you two, no need to worry at all about issues of protection or antivirals etc. However hopefully you have the type data to proceed to that stage quickly. Otherwise it might be useful for an additional test by either you or he or both.

 

Link to post
Share on other sites
Jeremy Spokein

We are not alone :) Thank God you all exist. You give me faith that I can enter a faithful, loving relationship again some day with someone who can understand.

Sometimes I create my own hell in my mind, though I know it's just the mind running amok and life only happens in the Present moment.

"I choose peace in this present moment." - really powerful mantra when you notice your mind running off into thoughts that are no good for you.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.



×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.