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Rules-Sex and herpes.(both partners have it)

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hi, i'm in my first week of having herpes. me and my girlfriend both have it and are in our first weeks. we have been together for 3 years and plan staying together. my question is, we both have it genitally so what are the "rules" for sex? she is on birth control and we are both free of any other std's. do we need to use lube? or wash up after? can we still perform oral sex on each other? i have read that you're body will fight off spreading Herpes as your immune system gets used to the virus. i have a very strong immune system but she doesn't. I really would appreciate all the help i can get!


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Herpes Awareness

Wait at least 6 weeks for your immunity to build up to the disease so you don't self-inoculate or cross-inoculate any further to new sites.

Even then, afterwards, don't engage in activity if either are suffering active OBs (lesioning). It's possible for instance for the infection to move to new sites such as the chest and mouth, which you really don't want -- it's twice the irritation and pain...

(It's possible self-inoculation say to the mouth may be headed off at the pass once you have systemic antibodies, it would be interesting to have some technical corroboration on that.)

Lube is also useful in general to prevent friction and transfer. Other people here can probably provide a whole bunch of other tips...

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I don't claim to have the answers but I'll just tell you what we've been doing. We are both HSV2 positive. I am on the pill. Herpes has affected our sex life, I won't lie, but it's not horrible. The beginning is the hardest because you don't know what's going on with your body. So just pay attention to when you get outbreaks. Also, I tear from normal sex in the same place where i got my original ob, so that may be an issue for her.

My bf is asymptomatic so i don't know for men what the deal is. I still go down on him, but he doesn't as much on me (prob per my request). Other people on here worry about it more--but i would wait until some time as gone by to completely go back to normal, after your immune system is built up. Also, I always wash after sex, always did--i think it is safer for any viral shedding. And keep your hands washed and I would avoid your eyes if there has been any intimate contact (just in case--you don't want it in your eyes).

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i never really stopped doing it to him, although i am always looking for any weird signs (which is not a turn on for him at all--as I am "scrutinizing" him). I kind of agree with the person who said in another thread that "well you caught it genitally during the same sessions where oral was involved..."

I thought about that and although I am still neurotic and feel like a giant petri dish waiting for the next OB (which I've never had and its been 3 months), I just decided to give oral sex when I want to, which is what I always did.

That's just me though... look up other threads on this. There are lots of them (under the search function).

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