Jump to content
World's Largest Herpes Support Group
Sign in to follow this  
NTR

Rules-Sex and herpes.(both partners have it)

Recommended Posts

NTR

hi, i'm in my first week of having herpes. me and my girlfriend both have it and are in our first weeks. we have been together for 3 years and plan staying together. my question is, we both have it genitally so what are the "rules" for sex? she is on birth control and we are both free of any other std's. do we need to use lube? or wash up after? can we still perform oral sex on each other? i have read that you're body will fight off spreading Herpes as your immune system gets used to the virus. i have a very strong immune system but she doesn't. I really would appreciate all the help i can get!

Neil

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Herpes Awareness

Wait at least 6 weeks for your immunity to build up to the disease so you don't self-inoculate or cross-inoculate any further to new sites.

Even then, afterwards, don't engage in activity if either are suffering active OBs (lesioning). It's possible for instance for the infection to move to new sites such as the chest and mouth, which you really don't want -- it's twice the irritation and pain...

(It's possible self-inoculation say to the mouth may be headed off at the pass once you have systemic antibodies, it would be interesting to have some technical corroboration on that.)

Lube is also useful in general to prevent friction and transfer. Other people here can probably provide a whole bunch of other tips...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
keepingthefaith

I don't claim to have the answers but I'll just tell you what we've been doing. We are both HSV2 positive. I am on the pill. Herpes has affected our sex life, I won't lie, but it's not horrible. The beginning is the hardest because you don't know what's going on with your body. So just pay attention to when you get outbreaks. Also, I tear from normal sex in the same place where i got my original ob, so that may be an issue for her.

My bf is asymptomatic so i don't know for men what the deal is. I still go down on him, but he doesn't as much on me (prob per my request). Other people on here worry about it more--but i would wait until some time as gone by to completely go back to normal, after your immune system is built up. Also, I always wash after sex, always did--i think it is safer for any viral shedding. And keep your hands washed and I would avoid your eyes if there has been any intimate contact (just in case--you don't want it in your eyes).

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
NTR

how long have you had oral sex since HSV?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
keepingthefaith

i never really stopped doing it to him, although i am always looking for any weird signs (which is not a turn on for him at all--as I am "scrutinizing" him). I kind of agree with the person who said in another thread that "well you caught it genitally during the same sessions where oral was involved..."

I thought about that and although I am still neurotic and feel like a giant petri dish waiting for the next OB (which I've never had and its been 3 months), I just decided to give oral sex when I want to, which is what I always did.

That's just me though... look up other threads on this. There are lots of them (under the search function).

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  

Advertisement

Try a Lysine supplement for cold sores

  • The Hive is Thriving!

    • Total Topics
      68,344
    • Total Posts
      456,328
  • Posts

    • walkthetalk
      yea I am on them.  Been taking them for about 8 months now.  I reckon they're good for general well being too, cause I am not as tired as I used to be and I didn't get the flu this year.  My blisters stopped after about the third month, but I really don't know if I am still positive or not, cbf doing a blood test and I am not dating so I don't mind not knowing for now.  But I am happy to stay on them for a while.
    • Pokemon
      See also: https://www.fredhutch.org/en/news/spotlight/imports/viral-shedding-level-dictates-risk-of-herpes-transmission.html  
    • Pokemon
      "We predict that transmission is unlikely at viral loads less than 104 HSV DNA copies" https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4006256/ The above quote suggests that transmission can take place with 10,000 copies (104).
    • vanish123
      See this article.  I would say that it is Herpes.   I have burning mouth syndrome and have to take a lot of antivirals.  Was valtrex then famicyclovir, then acyclovir.  https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.livescience.com/50455-burning-mouth-syndrome-herpes.html
    • vanish123
      Sorry to tell you, but I have the same thing.  Probably HSV 1.  It was not as bad as before, but when I kissed certain people it would get worse.  The last person I dated had HSV 1 and now I have it as burning mouth syndrome.  So here is the article.  I get tingles everywhere if I get saliva on me no matter where you kiss me.  So trigeminal area and my skin.  When the I guess initial outbreak was happening, I was getting fever and skin irritations everywhere.  Now I try to be careful not to kiss my partner  anywhere or touch my eyes etc, I do not need to spread it anywhere. https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.livescience.com/50455-burning-mouth-syndrome-herpes.html
×

Important Information

We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.