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scaredinnewengland

scared!!!! found out today!

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scaredinnewengland

i just found out today that i had herpes.... last night i had intercourse with my boyfirend. i thought it was a yeast infection so i went to the doctors to find out exactly what the hell it was.... yup not a yeast infection.... well last night we did use a condom but it fell off like it normally does.... for one i havent told him yet and will do the next time we have alone time and for anotehr we still havent found the right condom for us, i know not to have sex when i have an out break its like dur but last night i had no idea? how do i tell him i exposed him to a life altering virus? we have been together now for 2 months/ we work with each other different deptartments, not only am i dateing him but it seems like im dating the whole store, how do i make sure that it doesnt get spread that i have herpes? im on my way up the ladder here and this kind of "rumor" would put me back down to 'gum scrapper' status. i really like him and think for once in my life i have found the right man, very sweet and caring and this past weekend we got to the "i love you" stage of our relationship. but how do i know that love is enough to make it through this? i see him in my futre and i dont want to lose him. i think i just might lose him to the virus. do i ask him to go with me for a blood test? because the lady that did it said "i am almost positive" im like ummm almost doesnt cut it and she explained about a blood test for men and i asked for one too, and she said its not nessasary i am almost positive. again how can i feel reassured by "almost". i want a second opinion. but can you get a blood test done when you dont have a break out? because after this visit even though i have insurance i am flat broke. and by the time i can go to have the test this will be gone, for me this only last like 5 days with my period or just a few days after. no biggie. im so scared, what will people think. im not dirty, i dont sleep around and i use protection. so ya thats my problem in a nut shell

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OhmyGosh

I'm sorry you are going through this. you are not dirty your are fine, and perfect remember that. I didn't sleep around either i got this from a guy i had been with and known for ten years. most people here don't sleep around we just got unlucky.... Yes you can get a blood test without an outbreak and you should for your own piece of mind it will tell you what type you have which gave me some peace. wait at least 3 to 6 months to get it done, and have your BF get tested also. good luck you are going to be fine.;)

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helied2me

If you get the blood test now and it comes back negative this would indicate a new infection. Ask for an IgG type specific antibody test for HSV-1 and HSV-2. Do not get a combination test as this will not tell you what type it is. This is important to determine if you may have frequent outbreaks or rare outbreaks.

It doesn't matter that you aren't having an outbreak at the time as that is only necessary for a viral swab culture. If the blood test comes back negative, re-test. Most people will seroconvert between 3-16 weeks from exposure. Costs aren't usually very high with insurance coverage.

I hope the boyfriend handles this in confidence between the two of you, good luck sweetie.

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eatyourveggies

Did the doctor give you a swab test or just visual diagnosis it? Yes, you should get a blood test. He could have infected you. Did you two not get tested before you decided to have sex? And using protection doesn't stop this from spreading, any skin to skin contact does the trick.

You've only been together 2 months, so be prepared for anything. This can be quite traumatic for someone to hear so be prepared with knowledge of the virus when you tell him. And, really he should go get the blood test with you to see if he was already a carrier. If the love is really there things will go smoothly (and he is hopefully mature enough to not be spreading your business around work).

Best of luck!

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scaredinnewengland

for one i didnt know i had herpes and i asked to be tested 3 months ago, everything was clean but the only thing they didnt test for was what i have. it was a visual confirmation which is why i want a blood test. but im still telling him tonight and i am sure hes nnot going to run away. i think we are both mature enough to deal with this.

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scaredinnewengland

i have the best boyfriend in the world.... i told i cried he cried, we held each other and he said i had nothing to appoligize about i didnt know. if anything about this virus im happy he doesnt hate me for not knowing.and i hope i didnt pass it along to him in our last encounter. he said that we arent breaking up over this thing that we are strong enough to fight it. and keep it from being a ping pong match. im just so happy aafter telling him and crying we cuddled on the couch and watched our favorite show. i feel so loved and i feel that together we can take on the world. so thank you everyone for your support. and know if you do contact this virus it isnt the end of the world there are people out there who are like my boyfriend and will understand.

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chevyMisty

Glad to hear he took it so well. He seems like such a great guy. ^_^.

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Lifeislife

That's wonderful news! I am very happy for you both that you have the love and strength to cope and get through this together.

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