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I was tested a year ago for herpes and it was negitive, and I had a outbreak about 2 weeks ago, I tested positive. I am married, I know that I didn't cheat, I kinda had a feeling that my husband was, but he swears that he hasn't, could I have had this, for a long time and test negitive? or did I just get it within the last year? I asked my Doc. and she believes that I have just gotten it. because I tested neg a year ago, and I had a hesterctomy last July. I want to believe that my husband is telling me the truth, but I need to know. He has never had a outbreak, My Doc. says that some men never have outbreaks, but can be a carrier. I just need some peace of mind, me and my husband have been married 2 years, and I want to believe him, but I still remember that in Dec. he got distant and I thought he was cheating, in Feb I went to the doc. because I thought I had a bad yeast infection and she told me it was a sexually transmitted INFECTION, and then tested me for herpes, and it was postive. so can some one help me sort this out? :?

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?Has he/she cheated?? is probably one of the biggest most asked questions on the Internet forums these days. Your answer lies within your heart, as you look into your partner?s eyes when you ask him/her that question. I?ve learned long ago to trust my heart. The truth is your partner very well could have cheated, contracted the virus, which was than passed onto you. In the majority of the cases I?ve studied partners who haven?t cheated contracted the virus years ago. The virus has remained dormant or asymptomatic for years. The person infected has no clue that they have contracted the virus and may show no symptoms ever. In most of these cases the virus is shedding asymptomatically, the host spreads the virus to others un-knowingly. I have no credible evidence as to how long the virus can remain dormant in a host?s body, but I have read many testimonials that suggest the virus could remain dormant or asymptomatic for up to 15 years.

Scum, trash and garbage can be found anywhere on earth. The biggest scum/trash on earth are people who knowingly go around infecting others with this plague. Their sole mission in life is to have sex with as many people as possible. These people truly disgust me and they deserve to be shot like criminals. For those of you who knowingly date someone with herpes you know how it spreads and the signs to watch out for. If infected learn your body?s signs before outbreak and use common sense before you engage in sex with partners. These precautions can severally reduce spread of infection. For those of you involved in serious relationships your chances of catching herpes will eventually catch up with you even if protection is used. If both you and your partner are currently infected with the herpes virus, avoid sex during outbreak and wait it out until the ulcers have completely healed before engaging in any sexual activity. If you fail to do so you will continue to spread the infection from one partner to the other. If partner one is actively shedding HSV-1 while partner two is infected with HSV-2 (shedding) and they both have sex, there is a good chance that they will infect one another with both strains of the herpes simplex virus.


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Guest Anonymous

Well, first of all, if I were you I would have him tested. If he tests negative you can relax that he didn't give it to you and they must have somehow missed it the first time - or perhaps you hadn't developed antibodies yet? It takes 3 months to develop antibodies sometimes and it may not have shown up yet on your test 1 year ago. But that's a longshot, I know. So have him tested. If he resists, tell him it's so that you can plan how careful you need to be with him sexually, you need to know if you are at risk of giving it to him.

If he tests negative (or even if he doesn't), have him tested again in a few months. If this is recent for him the difference in levels may indicate something i.e. recent infection for him too.

Did you test positive via a blood test or a swab? The reason I ask is that if it was via a blood test, it is my understanding that it takes 8-12 weeks for the antibodies to develop enough to show up there. I may be way off but if I'm not, that would mean that you would have been infected before say, November - for whatever that's worth.

Now, it can both be true that you got it from him and he was not cheating. If he is asymptomatic you would have to be together a while to get it, if you got it at all from him, via shedding. So it could have been that the odds just now caught up with you.

Bottom line, I would imagine you could tell by his reaction to all of this if he has a guilty conscience. If he acts defensive about getting tested, coupled with his strangeness in December...well, your gut will tell you. You may end up having to choose to act on a suspicion. Unfortunately, people who cheat don't have much trouble lying...my heart goes out to you, whatever the reality is. That's rough. Take care

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    • WilsoInAus
      Welcome @Marlena correct you and your partner would benefit from the type specific version of the HSV test (meaning a separate result for HSV-1 and HSV-2). I had no idea the Euroimmun or equivalent actually had a combined version, it is pretty useless given the high incidence of HSV-1. Only one thing to add is that if you are getting frequent symptoms then you can obtain a swab and have this tested for HSV and other things as well.
    • WilsoInAus
      Yeah @FirstTimeUser there is nothing in the pic suggestive of genital herpes. It seems both you and your partner have HSV-1 orally and that's actually pretty cool. It means you won't pass it to each other's genitals owing to immunity. If the two of you are concerned about genital HSV-2 then mutually test for the IgG HSV-2 and HSV-1 antibodies.
    • CHT
      Hi "firstimeuser".... let's see what "WilsoinAus" thinks but, for what's it worth, I don't see anything in your picture (or description) that looks like herpes..... it actually looks more like a scrape or follicle issue.... maybe even a bug bite.  Also, by the way, the odds of having HSV2 with an outbreak on your testicles is very low.... that is not a typical spot for an HSV2 outbreak.    Have your doctor take a look and if you want some peace of mind, get an IgG antibody test for HSV2 in about 12 weeks (takes that long for antibodies to develop).... but, again, I don't think you have anything to worry about here.... just not seeing anything herpes-related here.    take care....best of luck.
    • CHT
      Hi Marlena..... since you stated you've had "herpes on the lips" then you likely have oral HSV1, which the majority of adults worldwide have... the fact your results for HSV1/2 are positive (at least I believe that's what your results show - I don't speak Polish but, I think I'm seeing your results are positive based on the attachment you included) may simply be reading the fact that you have HSV1.... the question is whether you've contracted HSV2 in your genital area. Your description of symptoms could possibly be related to HSV but, it's difficult to verify with certainty based on your description. You may also have contracted a different type of sexually transmitted infection (STI) or a simple fungal infection.   Your doctor does not believe what he/she is seeing is HSV but, unless your doctor has experience with HSV, they could easily misdiagnose your condition.  You need full STI testing. Do you have the option to travel to a larger city in Poland where you could get an appointment to be seen by a doctor with more experience with STIs?  You really need to have an experienced doctor take a look and run tests to check specifically for HSV2 as well as other STIs.  If they can rule out HSV2 or other STIs then hopefully they can then determine what is causing the redness, itching, and swollen condition.... again, it may not be HSV2 but, you need proper testing to verify.  Have you talked to your boyfriend about all this?  Has he had any symptoms on his genitals that are suspect?  Has he taken any tests to check for STIs?   I hope you can get more definitive testing so you know what you are dealing with and how best to treat it.  If you have any other questions/concerns, please come back and let us know.... I hope this helps a little.... best of luck.... take care.
    • CHT
      Hey Jeremy.... I know only too well that emotional pain you are feeling.... I really do.... and many of us on this site also know that pain.  It's not so much the physical side of having HSV that hurts, it's the stigma and risk of rejection that stings like hell!  You have to do what you think is right as it relates to when you disclose your HSV status when getting to know someone romantically.... I just think it's best to do it relatively early, and certainly before any sexual activity.   Have you looked into dating sites that cater to those with HSV?  I know others have had some luck with meeting partners on these sites.... you don't have to worry about the "disclosure" talk nor would you obviously have to worry about passing along a virus the other person already has.... take a few minutes and search around and see if it's an option you like. By the way, by taking your daily antiviral med and using a condom, your risk of passing along the virus is down around 1.9%.... pretty good odds that if you stick to your regimen you are very unlikely to transmit the virus....keep that in mind when you meet your next girlfriend and need to have "the talk."  That statistic might help calm any concerns about contracting the virus from you. I hope you don't give up.... as tough as it can be to find the right partner, it's still worth trying.... try to stay optimistic and look into some alternate options and see what happens.... all the best.... take care.
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